Conversations With Teddy
by AmiliaPadfoot
Summary: We have many conversations throughout life, interesting ones, boring ones, hurtful onse, some full of jokes, some...more somber. Talks of love, betrayal, pure madness and misery. But it's the ones with Harry, Teddy remembers most. Care to take a peek?
1. Stuck in traffic

_**Conversations with Teddy**_

_**By: Amilia Padfoot**_

_Stuck in traffic_

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything! Just the idea, plot and any OC's that pop up. _

_Summary: We have many conversations through out life, interesting ones, boring ones, hurtful onse, some full of jokes, some...more somber. Talks of love, betrayal, pure madness and misery. But it's the ones with Harry, Teddy remembers most. Care to take a peek? _

_A/N: I just love those little moments between Harry and Teddy and so many pop into my head. Here is where I'm putting those 'conversations' that I actually write down. They may be long, short, mostly dialog or even just a couple of paragraphs I have no idea but here they will go here. Some parts may be without Harry but most of them will be. Totally random, plots will vary. _

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><p><em><strong>Beep. Beep! Beeeeeeeep! <strong>_A car horn blasted out from behind him, its owner yelling in rage, demanding for the traffic to move. He might as well be yelling at the sky though for all the good it would do him, for he was going nowhere. The infinite cue of vehicles that snaked its way up the busy motorway was in no hurry to slither on.

Harry closed his eyes as he griped the steering wheel, his nails digging into the leather, praying for what was left of his sanity.  
>"What the <em>hell<em> is the hold up?" An irate man shouted out his window, blasting his horn once more.

"Chill out you idiot!" another voice sounded, just as angry, just as frustrated.

"Don't tell me to chill out, you arse!" The first retorted.

"Oh, you want a piece of me? Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough!" There was a slamming of doors and a jeer went up.

Harry turned up the car radio louder, and rested his head against the steering wheel while wishing the world would just fade into the background. He felt his eyelids drooping, exhaustion of the last few weeks catching up with him. Perhaps the halt wasn't such a bad thing after all, he mused sleepily, dreams already beginning to invade his consciousness.

**Crack! **Harry jumped, startled, his hand impulsively flying to his heart at the sound - _and_ sudden presence of someone sitting beside him.

"Ahhh! Dear Godric alive, Teddy! What the hell do you think you're playing at?"

"I'm sorry! Sorry, calm down." Teddy spluttered apologetically, hands held up as if to show he was unarmed, smiling sheepishly as his godfather clutched his heart.

"You can't just apparate into a moving vehicle, Teddy!" Harry berated him once his breathing had returned to normal.

"It's _not_ moving" Teddy pointed out half-heartedly.

"How are you supposed to _know_ that? I could have crashed! You could have been _seen_!"

"No, no, it's ok. I timed it right." Teddy reassured him, a slight hint of hurt in his voice that Harry though he would be so careless.

"Just don't do that again!" Harry snapped.

"Ok. Sorry." Teddy muttered and slumped down in the seat. "You alright?" Teddy asked eventually glancing at his pale godfather.  
>Harry sighed. "Yeah, I'm fine. Put your seatbelt on if you're staying" Teddy did as he was told, relieved that he wasn't being yelled at anymore.<p>

"I was wondering what was taking you so long"

"Really?" Harry glanced at the dashboard to look at the time, surely he wasn't _that_ late? He had left early, after all, anticipating the current traffic jam.

"Yeah. Hermione was getting worried" Harry smiled at the mention of his friend, then waved a hand at his windscreen, a never ending sea of traffic starched out in front of them was visible.

"Well, _as you can see_..."  
>Teddy frowned at the sight, finishing his godfather's sentence. "You're stuck in traffic"<p>

"Your powers of deduction are inspiring Teddy" Harry deadpanned.

"You're a _wizard_ and you're stuck in traffic?" Teddy asked incredulously, ignoring his godfather's sarcasm. "Can't you just _skip_ the queue?"

"No, I cannot!" Harry told him firmly, a determent glint in his eye as he spoke, "I'm no better than anyone in this queue, so I'll wait - just like them." Teddy rolled his eyes in exasperation at Harry's 'moral stubbornness', a fond smile tugging at his lips.

"Why are you _driving_ to work anyway?" Teddy questioned fidgeting in his chair. Sitting up slightly he reached underneath him, pulling out a newspaper he had been sitting on. He held it up to read the unfamiliar title, _'The Times'_, wondering why the front picture wasn't moving. "And why are you reading a Muggle newspaper?"

"Well I'm doing this Muggle liaison meeting thing with Smith-" Harry began explaining, but was cut off by Teddy's amused and poorly stifled snort.

"I'm sure _that's_ going well"  
>Harry shot him an annoyed look then attempted to sound dignified, "We may not get along Teddy, but we're mature adults..."<p>

"Yeah, huh? What was it exactly you said after you first met him? Oh yeah, you said, and I quote: 'He's the most narcissistic, supercilious, pompous nitwit I've ever had the displeasure of meeting'" Teddy imitated Harry to near perfection.

"I did not!" Harry cried. Teddy raised an eyebrow. "Ok, maybe I did" He conceded. "So we may not have started off on the right foot-"

"You can say that again" Teddy sniggered.

"Shut up" Harry huffed slumping down in his seat. "Why are you so surprised anyway?" He asked after a while, "I tell you that Ron and I _flew_ a car to Hogwarts and you're like... 'Oh wow. Cool.' But I _drive_ a car, to _work,_ and your _surprised_?"

Teddy just shrugged nonchalantly, "Just seems a bit pointless"

"At least I'm less likely to crash into a tree this way" Harry muttered and Teddy snorted.

"Never know with your driving"

"Oh! And where's _your_ driving licence, hmm Teddy? In your back pocket is it? Or your wallet perhaps?"

"Ok, ok _so_ I'm on my twentieth try! I'm trying alright? It's just so _confusing_! All those buttons and gears... urgh" Teddy threw his hands up in frustration, glaring at his bemused godfather.

"How is it that you can pull of a perfect Wronski Feint at-"

"That's different." Teddy cut in impatiently. "How many Muggles can do that anyway?"

"You'd be surprised Ted. Just because they don't use broomsticks to fly doesn't mean they couldn't if they had a proper one"  
>"How many Muggles <em>know <em>about magic anyway?" There was more curiosity in his voice than annoyance.

"Well, there's those who witness it accidentally, but people usually dismiss them as nutjobs and the ministry clear it up before it goes too far. Then there's the R.o.W.P.P. - Relatives of Wizarding Power Possessor's - usually the parents of Muggle-born's, maybe the odd gobby Nan or auntie. And then, those that are trusted. Those in high power, the people who the Muggle government assume can 'handle the truth'. There's more people aware of us than most think."

Teddy stared at Harry, trying to figure out whether he was being serious or not. "How do you know that? How is you know everything?" Teddy's mind briefly wandered back to when he was smaller, and had actually believed that Harry _did _know everything.

"I don't know _everything _Ted, and Muggle liaison, remember? Had to do some research." Teddy let out a hoot of laughter at that.

"You're like, forty and you're getting _homework_?"

"Its _thirty-six,_ thank you very much. And yeah, suppose I am" A smile tugged relentlessly at the corner of his lips as he tried to look annoyed at his godson, but he couldn't help it. He always felt so much better whenever Teddy was around, not that he was going to tell him that, or the fact that he was glad Teddy was next to him now, a welcome relief in the midst of abuse hurling drivers and a symphony composed entirely of beeping sounds.

The music on the radio changed and Teddy smiled as he recognised the familiar tune. "You know for a _thirty-six_-" Teddy made sure to stress the number "year old, you don't have bad taste in music"

"Thanks." Harry paused wondering if he had just been insulted or not "I think" He just put it down to a back handed compliment and shrugged.

"So what do you want then?"

"I told you! I was wondering what was taking you so long" Teddy protested. Harry gave well practised look of 'come on, how long have I known you?' Teddy, knowing _exactly _what the look meant, arranged his face into one of mock hurt.

"Why can't a guy just pop in-"

"Literally" Harry muttered.

"-and see his _dear_ godfather?" Harry chuckled at his godson's fake indignation.

"Is that a trick question?" he quipped and Teddy smiled sheepishly.

"Ok, maybe there is something"

Harry rolled his emerald eyes fondly. "Come on then out with it"

"Well-" Teddy began hesitantly "It's about Grimmauld-"

"Oh!" Harry interrupted, his eyes lighting up as if he understood something. "So _that's_why you were trying to give me a heart attack?" Teddy shot him a confused and slightly concerned look so Harry continued in a mock accusation, poking Teddy in the ribs. "Trying to kill me off already, are you?"

Teddy gaped at him eyes wide. "No-no! I –what?" he spluttered.

"Ted ,I was just joking" Harry told him reassuringly no longer smiling. Teddy however was not reassured in the slightest, horror shining in his eyes.

"You're _leaving_ it to me? Like- like in a will or something?"

Harry nodded looking like he regretted saying anything. "Yeah. I'm mean, Sirius left it to me, so it seems fitting, don't it? And you did live there yourself for a few years as a kid. Plus, it was in your mother's family..." Teddy's face darkened considerably at the thought of certain members of his mother's family, but he forced himself to think only of Sirius his mother and grandmother. Oh how, he missed his Gran. He had been four, going on five years old when she had passed away, when he had lost the very last connection to his blood family. He could barely remember her now.

Harry hurried on hating to see the sadness in his godson's eyes. He didn't want to be to one to drag up bad memories. "...and well, I want to. You don't _have_ to live there, you know. But it will be yours"

The last few words echoed in Teddy's mind and he imagined living there. He imagined seeing a memory behind every door, smelling Harry's scent, seeing his coffee mug left unused in the corner of the kitchen, walking into Harry's designated room there.

It was next to Sirius's old room, which hadn't been touched. No-one had dared go near it, not wanting to upset Harry. He knew Harry would go in there. He had watched him. Saw the pain in his godfather's eyes, a small sad smile on his lips. Even as a kid, when he didn't understand what was going on, why his godfather was standing in the room, or what the room meant to Harry, he had felt it. He had felt the pain washing off of him like waves. He imagining himself like that, the same look on his face, the same dull ache in his heart, standing in Harry's room.

"Teddy" Harry's voice cut through his thoughts and Teddy turned to look at him startled to find his vision slightly blurred.  
>"I'm not planning on dying anytime soon, you know" Teddy nodded, knowing that worrying about it was not going to help him, but nevertheless there was a lump in his throat. He tried to swallow it, but it seemed to be stuck in place.<p>

"I'm not sure I want it" He confessed. "I wouldn't want it if you..." Teddy trailed of mentally cursing himself as his breath hitched. Harry squeezed his arm reassuringly, as if to remind Teddy he was still there, healthy and whole. "I mean... the memories… you know..."

Harry nodded in understanding, knowing exactly what Teddy meant. It had been hard getting used to Grimmauld, knowing his godfather had lived there, had been _trapped_ there, had hated the place so much. Everything there just reminded him of Sirius. It had been Teddy really who had got him through it, who had given him a reason to keep going, that had reminded him that it was _his_ turn to be the godfather; and that one day when he had turned to leave Sirius's room and had seen Teddy standing there, so tiny and small, looking at him, he had sworn that he was never going to leave Teddy, that he was going to be as good a godfather as Sirius was to him - better, even. He had picked Teddy up and holding him tight he had vowed that he was going to look after Teddy with every waking breath. Harry frowned, coming back to reality.

"They'd be good memories though, right?"

"Yeah, course" Teddy agreed quickly, then shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. "I- look, I don't want to talk about this" In the effort to make his voice come out properly, he spoke more harshly then he intended. He shook his head again and spoke more softly "I _can't_ talk about his... I don't want to even _think_ about it. Please"

Harry nodded. "Ok Ted, but, er, didn't you want to ask me something?" He prompted gently.

"What? Oh yeah" Teddy cleared his throat with a cough, glad that the lump was gone. "Well, I was just wondering if, well...Vic and I need a place to stay" He continued, relieved to hear his voice come out normally as if he hadn't been thinking about his godfather dying only seconds before.

"Ted, why are you even asking? People stay there all the time."

Once Harry, Teddy and a very pregnant Ginny had moved out of Grimmauld to a cosy cottage in Godric's hollow, a far better place to raise children, Grimmauld had become a place for the whole family. A place to crash for the night if needs be or to meet up either casually or at a huge family gathering when there wasn't enough room at the Burrow or Molly needed a break. Teddy shook his head.

"I don't mean just to crash for the night"

"Oh! You mean more long-term?" Harry asked cottoning on. Teddy simply nodded. "What's wrong with your apartment?" Teddy shrugged.

"It's a bit too cramped for the both of us"

"Oh" The two lapsed into a comfortable silence broken only by the prattle of the radio presenter and occasional half-hearted beep. "So you two are getting pretty serious then? Moving in with each-other and that." Harry commented, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel in time with the music that had started up again. Teddy was about to reply when a loud cheer when up from behind them. Teddy glanced back at the sound.

"What's going on out there?"

"Some idiots are fighting each other" Harry replied unconcerned, leaning over to change the radio station as the previous one had suddenly moved on to traffic news which he had more than enough of for one day. "You know you're always welcome at ours" Harry casually reminded him leaning back in his chair. Teddy look at him dubiously.

"Me _and_ Vic?"

"Well no. I meant you don't have to leave home so early, I mean you're only nineteen and Vic's only seventeen"

"_You_ left home round the same age" Teddy pointed out and was startled by the dark shadow that crossed his godfather's eyes.

"If you mean the Dursley's..."

"No, no I meant the Burrow" Teddy corrected quickly. Harry had stayed at the Burrow for a year after the war, the whole family wanting to stay close and he _had_ finally accepted that he was part of that family. Plus, he got to stay with Ginny, which needless to say had been a bonus.

He had then moved to Grimmauld, after much renovating. Everyone had helped out with trying to make the place more habitable, which was no easy task but after a year of relentless work it was fit for humans to live in comfortably. Even random people he had never met before had stopped by to help out. With so many people now knowing where it was and coming in and out all the time most the concealing enchantments had all but crumbled.  
>Harry had been reluctant to accept help, especially from random people, but after being told to either shut up (Ron), to stop being so stubborn (Most the family) and that it was the least they could do (seemingly half the Wizarding population), he had relented.<p>

Teddy knew Harry didn't consider the Dursley's his family, and he couldn't really blame him. He knew little about the Dursley's or Harry's childhood outside of Hogwarts. It was almost as if _Hogwarts _had been Harry's home - that's what he had picked up whenever Harry talked about the place, that is. His eyes would light up and his voice would become animated as he talked about his time there. The very rare moments when Vernon and Petunia was mentioned, a dark look would cross his face and the adults nearby would look either sad or angry - or even both.

Dudley wasn't so bad as he and Harry got along better now, seeing each other at Christmas now and then - even Teddy had gone along sometimes - but Teddy (in fact, all the kids) knew better than to bring the topic up. Sometimes though it would come up un-expectedly or even Harry himself would bring it up without realizing.

He remembered clearly the day when Molly had been feeling unwell, and Harry had offered to cook much too everyone's surprise and unease. As the guest had arrived one by one to discover the identity of the cook for the evening they were less then subtle in their surprise. After the sixth or seventh proclamation of 'Harry? _Cooking_? Can he cook?' he had blurted out to a stunned silence 'Look, I've been bloody cooking since I was old enough to walk, I think I know how to make a simple meal for one lousy occasion!' What had followed had been a mouth-wateringly delicious and _very_ awkward meal.

Harry nodded, accepting the correction and Teddy continued.

"I know I'm welcome, don't worry, I just want to be with Vicky"

"It's alright Teddy" Harry interrupted. "I understand. Just don't grow up too fast, yeah?"

"Wouldn't dream of it" Both Godfather and Godson jumped at the sound of mass beeping coming from behind them. Harry turned to see what the commotion was but Teddy tugged his arm and pointed at the windscreen. What was once a sea of traffic was now a near-empty road.

"Guess were moving again"

"Finally" Teddy muttered as Harry when to start the car up again and he frowned as Harry hesitated.

"Do you want to apparate out before I get going?" Harry turned to look at him and didn't bother to resist an eye roll. Did Harry really think he'd just leave after getting what he wanted? He paused pretending to think about it.

"Nah. Think I might stick around for a bit, you know… poke you if you fall asleep, all that lark, don't want you to crash into a tree again"

"Aw, didn't know you cared" Harry sniffed as if deeply touched as he started the car up again, ignoring the insistent beeps. Teddy once again rolled his eyes, a recurring habit from his earlier teenage years, one that Harry blamed him for passing on to James, as he inwardly thought:

'_More that you probably know'._

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><p><em>The obligatory R&amp;R. Thanks to DrammionePerfeced for Beta-ing and putting up with me! The only reason this is up now is because I wrote this a while ago. I haven't wrote since the last chapter of Birthdays and when ever the next one is up it means I've finaly found sometime to write. :-) Anyway let me know what you think and if you want me to continue to put my random Teddy conversations up. :-) updates will be sporadic, sorry. <em>


	2. Waiting up for me

_**Waiting up for me**_

"Bye guys!" Teddy called from the doorway of the Godric's Hallow cottage, his head feeling slightly lighter than it had done a few hours before. They waved back at him, Jack staggering slightly as he slung an arm around his girlfriend Katie, who was grinning at Teddy. She was holding her turquoise high-heels in her hands, not caring in the slightest that she was now barefoot.

Ben and Lady were also waving, Lady rolling her eyes at Jacks antics. Ben was doing a weird goodbye dance that was a combo of the Macarena and the robot, falling over in the process. Teddy and Lady shared a half-bemused, half-exasperated look and stifled a giggle. Lady looked down at Ben sprawled on the floor, holding a hand up to her. She raised an eyebrow at him, her hands on her hips, attempting to look stern, only to have him looking back up at her with big brown puppy-dog eyes. She sighed relenting and took his hand only to be pulled down on top of him. She squealed and Katie hushed her.

"Guys! Shut up! You'll wake Teddy's family up" Teddy felt a warm rush at the Potters being referred to as his family - which they were, don't get him wrong - it was just odd having it said so casually, as if it had never been any other way.

"Sorry" Ben muttered and picked himself, and Lady, up before sending Teddy a worried glance.

"Your godfather's not a light sleeper, is he?" Ben glanced up at the windows as if expecting a light to flicker on any second.

"Yeah, he is actually" Teddy stifled a laugh at Ben's panicked look. "But he's been doing double shifts lately so I doubt he's awake right now" Teddy reassured him, inwardly hoping that his mates hadn't woken anyone up, or worse, that Harry was awake anyway and he'd find him yet again waiting up for him. He pushed down his irritation and smiled at his friends as they got themselves together.

"Say hello to Ginny for my mum, yeah?" Katie called, whose mother had once been a member of the Holyhead Harpies alongside Ginny, as they apperated away.

Teddy smiled to himself, happy that he had such great friends, and closed the door softly. It was dark inside, but as he knew that slightest bit of light could rouse Harry, he carefully made his way through the room through the darkness - but not carefully enough, it seemed, as he walked right into a cabinet. Biting down hard on his lip to stop the colourful stream of language that was fighting to leave his mouth, he gripped his foot, begging for the pain to go away as he hopped up and down on the spot.

Teddy stiffened, stopping mid-hop at the sound of someone stirring to the left of him where he knew the sofa was.

"Teddy?" Teddy froze unsure of what to do. "Teddy, I know it's you" Teddy turned and could just about make out two green orbs in the blackness. As his eyes adjusted he could see Harry, who was rubbing his eyes, more clearly

"Yeah. Hey" Teddy greeted finally.

"Whattimmisit?" Harry asked him sleepily. Teddy had to hold back a fond smile and answered.

"Two-ish, I think"

"Two? AM? Why are you out so late?" Harry demanded in such a parental tone that Teddy could barely resist an eye-roll.

"I was with my mates" Harry huffed and pinned Teddy with a look that made him squirm subconsciously. He looked about ready to lecture him, but Teddy blurted out before he could stop himself,

"Why must you insist on waiting up for me all the time?"

"I don't wait up for you, I often stay up late to get work done, you know that" Harry sat up on the sofa and crossed his arms over his chest as he protested. Teddy rolled his now-green eyes, not realising they had changed.

"Yeah, right, like that isn't an excuse. Look, I appreciate it but really, can't you just trust me to come home? I have my own keys, it's not like I need you to open the door." Teddy crossed his arms over his own chest, mirroring Harry, a determined look on his face.

"If I didn't trust you to come home, I would let you stay out at all." Harry pointed out and Teddy's voice rose slightly in irritation.

"Then why wait up for me? And don't say work! You were fast asleep on the sofa last night as well"

"So? I fell asleep" Harry shrugged.

"Yeah, _waiting _for me."

Harry through his arms up in frustration "I'm sorry, alright! I'm sorry if I like to know that you've got home alright. Why do you have to stay out so late anyway?"

"Oh, come on! Like you never stayed out late when you were younger." Teddy accused moodily.

"Only to get out of the house, only because I didn't want to go back." Harry slumped back into the sofa a bitter look on his face. Teddy felt his irritation at his godfather's over-protectiveness ebb away in spite of himself.

"It's not that I don't like it at home, I do. I just want to spend time with my mates." Teddy shifted from one foot to another, wincing as he lent on his injured one, making sure to keep Harry's eye contact.

"Have I ever objected to that?" Came Harry's calm response. Teddy mentally cursed his luck that he had to have a guardian in the legal profession.

"No" Teddy relented, huffing as he sat down on a table opposite Harry.

"Well, there you are then, just not so late, yeah?" Harry nudged Teddy's leg with his socked foot. Teddy just shrugged, neither protesting or agreeing. Harry sighed and opened his mouth to speak, but Teddy got there first.

"Did you ever have a curfew?" Teddy couldn't blame himself for being curious when he knew so little of how Harry was brought up. He had used to think Harry had been brought up amazingly for him to be such a good parent. That illusion hadn't stayed in his mind long that was for sure, he had soon worked out even form an early age that Harry's raising had been less than perfect. Harry shrugged not seeming to be putting much thought into remembering.

"Yeah, whenever Dudley got home." Harry shrugged again and looked down at his hands missing Teddy's confused look.

"What do you mean whenever he got home?"

"Well, I had to be home when or before he was. It was considered the 'right time'" Harry added far too tired to muster up any bitterness to underline his words.

"That's absurd!" Teddy cried.

"This is why I was thinking of setting you a time..." Harry began leaning forward.

"Setting me a time? For Godric's sake, I'm not a kid!"Teddy roared, momentarily forgetting the new piece of information he had collected about Harry's 'home life'.

"It's just to make things simpler - I mean, if you are going to stay longer you could just send me a message to let me know... I'm not asking for much Teddy" He reasoned calmly and Teddy conceded.

"Yeah, alright. What time?" He mumbled while stifling a yawn.

"Seven"

"Seven! No way!" Harry held up his hands in surrender and smiled.

"Alright, alright. I had to try."

"Twelve?" Teddy suggested hopefully. It was Harry's turn to object.

"No way."

"I had to try." Teddy smirked, then offered eleven.

"Nine" Harry shot back and Teddy bargained,

"Nine and a half!" Harry paused to think about it for a second the nodded

"Deal." The two of them stood and shook hands as seriously as they could. Harry pulled Teddy's hand, pulling him right into a quick hug muttering goodnight before releasing him. He turned to leave but Teddy called him back.

"Yeah?" Harry turned.

"What happened when you didn't get in before Dudley? Did they, like, ground you?"

"Nah, not really." Harry stretched his arms, yawning and shrugging as he did so.

"Lucky." Teddy muttered.

"They just didn't let me in" Harry turned to leave not noticing Teddy's horrified look before he turned back once more at the sound of Teddy's furious cry,

"What! But- but where did you sleep?" Harry looked at the carpet uncomfortably wishing he hadn't said a thing. Teddy knew that it was only because of metal exhaustion that Harry had even mentioned it at all. Teddy couldn't help but wonder if the uncaring tone would still be there if Harry had mentioned this little fact to him when he was more awake. Sickeningly, he knew somehow it would be.

"It only happened once don't worry. I never let it get that late." Harry was hasty to reassure. It didn't help.

"Did you sleep outside?" Teddy tried not to imagine his young godfather curled up on the front step shivering, or all the things that could have happened to him, especially with him being the Boy-Who-Lived. Not to mention perverts and kidnappers but add Deatheaters and...

Teddy's panicked thoughts trailed off as Harry gripped him by the shoulder.

"I didn't sleep outside, don't worry. I'd always leave my window open just in case." He decided to leave out the fact that his was on the second floor, seeing his godson was distressed enough. Teddy sagged in relief and Harry pulled him into him. "Don't worry about it Ted, it was ages ago." Teddy nodded feeling exhaustion take over him. Harry shook him.

"Come on, sleepy head, your too big for me to carry now" Teddy tried to smile but failed. Harry sighed and slung Teddy's arm over his shoulder and together they slowly but surely made their way up the stairs, collapsing inches away from Teddy's bed where a very bemused Ginny was to find them in the morning.

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><p><strong>Yea<strong>**! An Update! Sorry this was short (and random- but face it now they ALL will be), as will the next one _may_ be, but I can promise some longer ones after :-) Huge thanks to Drammy for betaing! It's mind-boggling how amazing she is. **

**Anyway, you know the drill, please review -they really do encourage me to keep writing. Annon reviewers - you WILL be replied to on my profile. Everyone else, even if you don't review, please _please_ at _least_ go on my profile and answer my poll! Thanks. Well love you all, and have a HARRY CHRISTMAS! Over and out -Ami x**


	3. Teddy hated the carpet

_Teddy hated the carpet._He had nothing against it, as such. They were not _enemies_, he didn't go out of his way to hurt it or it him, but he found it very hard to like when it was so _itchy_ to touch. He liked the beanbags in the corner a lot better. He particularly liked the plain light blue one, the one that was the colour of the sky. It was such a nice colour. He'd have liked to change his hair to match, but he wasn't allowed. He wasn't allowed to change his hair or eyes or nose - or anything! And that, for Teddy, was no fun at all. He found it very unfair, if he was honest. It was very hard to control, too, and a lot of the time it wasn't _really_his fault. He couldn't help it if when Peter Matthews would steal his friend's apple his hair liked to change red. He was angry. How else was he supposed to feel? _Happy? _No, it was very hard, but he prided himself that he had become very good at it.

He tried not to think about the carpet but, as he lay on his stomach, he found it was all he could look at. He didn't want to listen to his friends chatting about girly things. They were just so _boring_. He was very thankful that he had his friend Daniel to keep him from going crazy. It was at times like this he didn't know why he had two girls as mates when they liked talking about dresses and dolls so much, but when he, Jessica and Lady played together, he understood. It was just so much fun, and a very smart plan of his, he had to admit.

He allowed a small smile as he thought of it. He wasn't allowed to tell his friends what he was, or what he could do. So if he couldn't _tell_ them, he would show them. Through their pretend adventures together he could share his world with them and he wouldn't get in trouble because they wouldn't see any of it as real. Yes, he was quite happy with his plan and he had so much fun with his friends, but there was only so much they would want to play that game with him.

They were girls and girls like to talk about girly things and Teddy, being a boy, had no interest in said girly things. It seemed very simple to him but when he had explained this to Jessica she had seemed a bit hurt and he didn't like it when Jessica Lawrence was hurt. He liked it when she was happy. He liked it when she laughed. He didn't know why exactly except that it made him smile. She made him smile. She was very pretty.

He especially liked it when he got to be the Sir Teddy the brave knight (Wizard, he would tell himself, but the others said knight was cooler) and rescue her from the fierce dragon (Daniel waving his arms going _**'arghhhhhh'**_. It wasn't exactly the same, but he didn't think Miss Price would appreciate a real one in her classroom somehow. Hey, he could imagine). He really liked that, as she giggled a lot and he got to hold her hand - only to lead her down the treacherous path away from her tower, of course.

Ginny had made a weird awing sound when she had heard him retelling that particular venture to Harry, who seemed to be trying very hard not to laugh, and his 'cousin' Vicky had been mad at him for days after; which, he thought to himself, was why he didn't mention his adventures much anymore. Girls...were weird.

At least Harry had had a _reasonable_ reaction, even though his still didn't get what was so funny unless it was at the way Vicky went a bright red looking like a blond tomato. Not really caring, he yawned widely hoping his friends would get the hint.

Neither Jessica nor Lady made any sign of stopping their giggles but fortunately Daniel _did_ get the message and managed to change the conversation to the swimming pool he now had in his garden. The girls seemed excited by this and asked if they could come over on the weekend. Teddy, who wasn't that much of a swimmer quickly admitted to having plans when invited, which he did after all. His insides squirmed with excitement as he thought about going to watch Ginny play Quidditch against Puddlemere united.

Harry, a Puddlemere united fan, particularly like the matches as apparently he couldn't lose. Although it _was_ funny to watch him hide his support from Ginny so he wouldn't get glared at. He chuckled as he imagined his godfather being pinned down by his wife's look,

'It would be great if they won! Er, but _obviously,_ it would be better if _you_ won love, though it would be nice; they are a good team after all, but their chasers have nothing on you, though they are good, but you're better, obviously…" Ginny would nod, accepting his answer, Harry would sigh in relief and a very amused Ron would mutter something along the lines of, _'Nice escape, mate'._It happened every time.

He tuned back into his mates conversation, fully expecting weird looks at chuckling to himself so much, but instantly regretted it. They were paying no attention to him. Daniel had stopped bragging about how amazing his dad was to build such an awesome thing and the others had chimed in, Lady babbling on about the intricate and completely realistic dolls house her dad had made her for her birthday and Jessica, whose dad was Lady's uncle, was bouncing up and down as she talked of her ballet classes which he had paid for.

Teddy was about to jump in stating that Quidditch was far more exciting than swimming, ballet or a dolls house that, quite frankly, _did_ nothing but he stopped himself. Not because they would have no idea what he was on about, he hadn't seen how to introduce it into their games yet and if he had they'd find him weird for thinking it was real, but because he felt guilty.

Harry, after all, as amazing as he was, wasn't his dad. Not _really_. He sure as anything felt like one. He was the closest thing Teddy had, but he wasn't. Teddy glanced up at his arguing friends, not even feeling happy that Jessica shared his views and though Lady's doll house was boring, nor annoyed that she felt ballet was far the best, and felt like he was seeing them for the first time.

Were those things really important? Yes, they were nice, they were special to them, their dad's had all put time and effort into making them or working hard to afford them, but that was just it, they were _things_. What about looking after them when they were ill, or cheering them up when they were down, or listening to you babble on about dragons when they had work to do but they find you more important? Why weren't his friend's arguing about those things? He supposed it was because any decent dad would do those things. But not every dad could afford to build their son a swimming pool or take their daughter to ballet lessons.

Daniel turned to Teddy not wanting his mate to be left out, though- more likely- really bored with the talk of dancing and dollies, and asked "What about you Teddy?"

Lady hit him on the arm and glared at him as if to say 'don't be so insensitive'. Daniel immediately looked guilty and started to apologise for starting a topic about dads when Teddy didn't have one, but Teddy didn't let him instead stating quite proudly, tiring to keep any form of misery out of his voice,

"My dad died so I could grow up in a better world" Nobody knew quite what to say to that, and with that Teddy went back to looking at the carpet, realizing it wasn't really worth hating.

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><p><strong>Hello again guys! Sorry for the wait, and that this was short, and again very random. Oh well it's a look at younger Teddy. :-) The next one will be much longer. There is another conversation that follows on from this bit which has Harry in it, but it will posted later on. Why? Because I haven't wrote it yet. But you guys deserve to have something and I really wanted this to go before the next one as it shows Teddy with one of the OC's above, but older. Ah don't worry guys I know what I'm doing. I hope you liked it. If you didn't, at least hold on till the next one.<strong>


	4. Not the one?

**Hello everyone! This Chapter is dedicated to Vitzy. I hope you enjoy it.**

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><p><em><strong>Not the one?<strong>_

Teddy picked at the blades of grass by the river. Catching his reflection, he quickly returned his eye colour to a warm chocolate brown that Jessica loved so much, and, more importantly, that he had worn when she first met him. It would take a lot of explaining if she looked up and he suddenly had ocean blue eyes.

Teddy picked harder at the grass, wondering wearily if it would all just be so much easier if she _did_ notice. He twisted a long blade around his finger, wishing his heart would stop the bloody racket it was making in his ears, as it was certain that its owner was in a marathon and not in fact sitting quite still on a blanket by a river bed. The pounding was getting louder as he let his own panicked thoughts swirl in his mind. He didn't register that Jessica had even spoken till he had felt her hand on his.

He took a brief second to marvel at the softness her hand possessed as it brushed his. "Sorry, did you say something?"

Her eyes were narrowed in concern as she spoke, "I asked if you were alright?"

"Oh" Teddy replied lamely gazing in to her hazel orbs, wondering what emotion they would show when he told her. Told her everything.

"Well?" she prompted.

"What? Oh yeah, I'm fine" He reassured her, coming back to his senses. Disbelief clouded her graceful features.

"You sure? You seem... quiet" Teddy's heart lifted at the concern in her voice. She obviously cared about him. She loved him. He was sure of that. He loved her. He was sure of that. Then everything would be fine. There was nothing to worry about. He suddenly had a good feeling and he decided to seize the moment before dread could flood him again.

"Yeah, it's just that..." He trailed off, unsure of how to begin the conversation that he had been dreading for so long now. The one that could even possibly be the last he had with her, but he pushed that thought aside focusing on his new found confidence.

"Yes?"

"Jess, remember when we were younger...and we played that game?" Jessica's brow furrowed in concentration before her eyes lit up.

"Oh! You mean the one when were witches and wizards and you would save me from the evil dragon." She gushed "It was a Hungarian hornet and-"

"Horntail" Teddy corrected automatically.

"Yea." She agreed indifferently before smiling, as if reminiscing on fond memories, and giggling. "Oh, you had such a wild imagination Teddy!" Teddy forced a smile. How was he supposed to tell her that he hadn't imagined a thing? Well, apart from the rescuing her from a dragon, among over things. But it wasn't that hard to imagine when Charlie had shown him one, from afar of course, on one of his trips to Romania, and he had a model of one that Harry had given him on his bedside table.

Teddy took a breath, deciding it was now or never. Feeling like he was a diver about to take his deepest plunge yet, he asked, "Do you ever think that any of that might be well, _true_?"

There was a long silence in which 'diver Teddy' held his breath. She stared at him, as if she'd never seen him before, then her face lit up and Teddy's heart jumped and she laughed and it shattered. He couldn't place a time when he had ever hated the sound of her laughter.

"What, that there are dragons, and wands and a magical castles where witches and wizards learn potions-" She was giggling and he quickly grew annoyed.

"Well, there are other lessons too, like Charms and Transfiguration-" but she wasn't listening. Giggling harder, she lightly punched his arm.

"You're so funny, Teddy." Feeling like she had hit him far harder that she actually had, he forced another smile. Trying to piece himself back together, he told himself that it was bound to sound ridiculous to her at first. He just had to keep trying. _Little steps,_ he told himself calmly.

"No, I mean magic" Thankfully, she didn't laugh but seemed to seriously ponder.

"I suppose. Well there's like magic tricks-" Teddy quickly shook his head. That wasn't what he meant at all. She frowned and tried again, "Love? That's kind of magic, right?" Teddy nodded vigorously, as if encouraging a child with a simple maths problem. She smiled as if she'd achieved something and so did Teddy, thinking at least he was getting _somewhere_.

"Do you really believe in that kind of stuff?" She asked taking him off-guard.

"It depends on what you mean by 'stuff'" He didn't want her to think he was into some kind of occult or devil worship or something.

"Witches and wizards and that? I mean, that was just kids stuff." She looked at him hard, as if begging him to agree and he gulped. He knew he could laugh it off like he had been, tell her he was just messing with her and all would be back to normal. But could he do that now? Could he keep hiding himself from her? To keep lying to her? He liked her, really liked her. He owed her the truth and living with someone for the rest of his life and lying to them every day just didn't appeal to him at all.

It wasn't like his magic was easy to conceal, either - especially with him being metamophangus. His appearance was bound to change around her at least once and that would be all it would take. And he could keep his magical life a secret either?

How was he supposed to dodge questions like 'what do you want to do when you leave school?' A simple topic yes, one that they had thankfully never discussed, but how was he supposed to tell her_: 'Oh I want to be an Auror like my Mother and Godfather or maybe be an Oblivator… what's that you ask? Oh, you erase people's memories with your wand...'_Or _'What did you get in your G.C.S.E's Ted?'_ _'Oh, I didn't take them, I got an O in Transfiguration though, didn't do so well in potions mind, melted my caldron and caused my examiners desk to disintegrate. He wasn't too happy.' _Neither conversations seemed entirely appealing unless it was in a future where Jessica knew about those things, or believed they could exist.

No, he had to tell her before things got too serious between them. Would she accept him though? She had to, he told himself firmly. She would. She loved him so she would find a way to accept it.

"No, Jessica. It's not. I know this sounds crazy, but I'm a Wizard" Teddy peeked under his fringe at her waiting for her reaction. She stared at him blankly.

"Right." She smiled at him and Teddy felt another twinge of annoyance. She reminded him of someone indulging a small child and that irked him. He stared back at her and she seemed to realise that he wasn't going to smile back. "Teddy, you can stop now."

"I'm being serious" Teddy placed his hand on hers but she tugged away. He tried not to feel too stung.

"No. You're not" She told him firmly, her eyes stony. Teddy bit back his reply, not wanting to get into a battle or 'am too, are not' with his girlfriend. He took a deep breath and ran a hand thought his hair. He paused mid-movement as a thought struck him, but he would leave it as a last resort. He really didn't want it to come to that.

"Jessica. I swear to you. I _am_ a Wizard. I can do magic, I go to Hogwarts; the magical school I told you about- it's real!" He was beginning to sound desperate. Jessica placed her hands over her ears and shook her head vigorously "I can do spells and make potions, though I'm kind of bad at it, and-"

"Stop it!" She snapped taking him by surprise. "You think I'm stupid? What do you hope to gain from this?"

"I- _what_? Nothing! I'm telling the truth!" He placed his hands together as in prayer and tried to remain calm, yelling wasn't going to help. "I'm telling the truth" He repeated. Jessica looked him up and down, frowning, as if trying to work him out. She no longer looked angry and Teddy took that as a good thing.

"You really believe that?" Teddy nodded keeping his face straight. He had to show her how serious he was. That he wasn't trying to mess with her. "You really believe you're a _wizard_?" She said it as if he had told her the sky was green and would swap with the ground at Christmas time.

"I _am_ one, yes" he told her confidently. She nodded seriously and Teddy tried hard not to get his hopes up. Was she believing him? Jessica then turned and reached for her bag. Teddy was about to protest but relaxed when he saw her take out a pen and piece of paper. She handed it to him once done. It had a phone number on it.

"What's this for? Has your number been changed?" She shook her head and replaced her pen.

"It's my uncle's number"

"Why would I need that?" She looked back at him, almost pityingly.

"He can help you" Teddy simply blinked at her wondering what was going on. His mind drew a blank as he stared at the number. "He's a psychiatrist."

Teddy gaped at her as anger bubbled inside him. He couldn't believe it. She thought he was mad? Delusional? That he had a problem with his metal state. "I don't need a physiatrist!" He protested chucking the paper into the river. She looked at him dubiously, clutching her bag to herself. Betrayal rose in him at the sight.

"I was only trying to help." she mumbled.

"I don't need help, Jessica. I just need you to believe me" He said it a softly as he could, beating down his anger and hurt that she couldn't accept who he was.

"I can't" She blurted.

"Why?" He countered quickly and Jessica opened and closed her mouth several times before yelling, "Because it's absurd!"

"How is it?" He persisted. He had to make her see how irrational she was being towards the whole thing.

"There is no such thing as magic, or wizards, or dragons!" She shouted at him, jumping up, breathing heavily.

"There is! I _know_ there is!" He shouted back, also getting up, feeling like he had to defend his world against her ignorance. Jessica's eyes widened and eyed him cautiously. Teddy took a step back and a deep breath realising he wasn't doing a very good job of convincing her he wasn't mad.

"Look Jess, I'm only telling you this because I like you. Because I want to be with you, and I don't want to keep who I am from you. I want you to be a part of my life and the only way you can do that is if you believe me. If you understand my world. I want to share it with you Jess. Magic isn't something to be scared of. It's wonderful. I know it's a lot to ask. But please could you hear me out? Do you think for just a _second_you could consider that I'm telling you the truth? Do you think you could accept that?" He looked at her beseechingly, hoping beyond hope.

She shook her head. "I don't know, Teddy." He truly felt that he could have died right there. She bit her lip and shook her head again. "I believe that _you_ believe that, Teddy. But I don't think it makes what you say true"

"Please Jess, it is true." He felt tears sting at the corner of his eyes. He had truly thought she would believe him. He had thought she would at least have an open mind, but to reject the idea all together? Did all thoughts fantasies they used to share mean nothing to her? He guessed that's all they had ever been to her. But to him, those games they used to play were so much more. It had been a way of letting her into his world, have her experience it without really revealing it. And now she was rejecting it. _Rejecting him._

"Magic, like that, just doesn't exist Teddy. You just have to accept it" Teddy shook his head, desperately thinking of a way to convince her. It hurt, it truly hurt how, even if she didn't really know it, she was telling him that a huge part of his life simply didn't exist.

"It does. I- can- I can prove it!" He knew he was taking a risk, a huge risk. Not only could he get into trouble, but it could go horribly wrong. But he couldn't lose her. He couldn't have this relationship ending with her thinking he was just some sad, delusional kid.

She looked at him dubiously, pityingly which only made him more determined. He knew he could simply change his hair but he wanted to show her something special, something more, well...magical. He reached into his pocket and took out his wand. Jessica raised an unimpressed eye-brow at him, probably thinking it was a twig. Teddy ignored this and closed his eyes, focusing on a happy memory. He pointed his wand away from him and whispered: "Expecto patronum". He didn't really expect her to be impressed that he could produce a patronus at his age, but he was quite proud of it.

A silver wolf cub erupted out of his wand and ran across the fields. It began to chase its tail and Teddy grinned watching it. He looked back a Jessica, anticipating her stunned expression. She had dropped her bag and was staring, looking from Teddy to the wolf.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" He asked her. Far from mesmerised, however, she stumbled back from him. His grin fell of his face as he watched her. "Jess?"

"This isn't right" She stammered. "This is crazy. It's –it's- I'm not seeing this. This isn't possible!"

"It _is_ Jess." He told her gently taking a step closer to her. She jumped back.

"It's not right! You shouldn't be able to do that." She clutched her hands to her head. The wolf had vanished and Teddy knew he had made a huge mistake. "Just-just stay away from me!" She glared at him. "You're a freak!" she yelled before grabbing her bag and running, leaving Teddy shattered and alone.

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><p>Teddy had barely finished knocking when the door was flung open to reveal James, who was somewhat of a younger brother to him. He had untameable raven black hair that was currently sticking up in all directions as if he'd been shocked several times. His hazel eyes twinkled with mischief, his trade-mark cheeky grin, that seemed be a permanent feature, was in place as ever, but the sight didn't serve to cheer Teddy up like it usually did. Not really in the mood for greetings, he passed James and stepped inside.<p>

"Nice to see you too, Teddy" James muttered sarcastically to himself, closing the door. Teddy ignored him and made his way into the fruitless living room. "You alright, Teddy?" Teddy just nodded as he scanned the room before making his way into the next, James following behind.

"You sure?" James prompted, but Teddy ignored him once more. He felt like he was walking in a haze. As if he had been struck across the head and hung upside-down for a very long time. Everything was upside-down. He felt numb, barely registering the burning in his eyes. He couldn't think properly. He was working on autopilot, letting his instinct control him. It had brought him here and now it was giving him one very clear message, one very simple task, a strong burning impulse and it was all he could think of.

"Where is he?" Teddy turned back to James desperately. James was about to ask who he meant but he took one look at his, for lack of better term, big brother's dishevelled looks and red-rimmed eyes and no longer felt the need.

"Kitchen. I'll go get him for you" Teddy simply nodded, feeling a slight relief as he allowed James to pull him back into the living room where he sat on the sofa his head in his hands. What had he done? How could he have been so stupid? He had ruined everything!

He felt guilt lick like flames inside him, guilt that he had scared her, but the flames also contained a burning rage at her rejection. They were, however, smothered by a numbing hurt. Her last words before she had vanished haunted him. He felt vulnerable, like she had sliced him open and the wound still stung. He felt like curling up on the sofa in a foetal position and just laying there. To just submit to the darkness and sleep.

He tensed as he felt two arms wrap around him, but soon relaxed as a more awake part of him told him he was completely safe.

"What happened, Ted?" Teddy let his godfather's voice wash over him and feeling like a five year old, wanting comfort after falling over, he lent into Harry's embrace and muttered - "I told her."

Harry didn't have to ask which 'her' he was referring to and instead asked, "Told her what exactly?"

"That I'm a wizard. I just couldn't keep it from her anymore" Teddy's shoulders slumped depression seeping in.

"How did she take it?"

"How do you think?" Teddy retorted spitefully. It took him a second to feel bad, but it _was_ quite obvious that it did not go the way he wanted it to, he mentally defended.

"How bad was it?" Harry amended.

"She laughed at first. Thought I was joking." He shrugged, hoping to sound casual.

"It _is_ kind of hard to believe" Harry granted and Teddy couldn't help but agree - but he had given her _proof_! _Which had made things worse_, he reminded himself. He pushed aside his disputing thoughts and kept talking.

"She thought I was messing with her. But I wouldn't do that"

"I know, Teddy. I know." Harry comforted reassuringly.

"She should know. She should have known I'm not like that. I thought she knew me, but of course she didn't. That's why I was trying to tell her in the first place - but she just though I was crazy. She even gave me a number for a physiatrist!" It all came rushing out, all his anger and hurt forming words, and he had to admit it felt better having the feelings come out of him instead of swirling around inside him.

"Ouch." Harry winced at the last and Teddy nodded, remembering how betrayed he felt when she had given him the number. "Teddy, you_know_ it's a lot to take in." Teddy sighed knowing Harry was trying to make him see it from Jessica's point of view. "And without proof people-"

"I gave her proof!" Teddy interrupted him fiercely "I showed her my patronus" He felt Harry tense beside him.

"Ted-" he began in a warning tone but Teddy cut him off, knowing what was coming.

"Yes, I know. I shouldn't have. It was irresponsible. My actions could have worse consequences that my girlfriend thinking I'm..." Teddy trailed of not wanting to think about it. Harry narrowed his eyes at him, but seemed to let his sudden stop slide.

"Well, I'm glad you realised that. I'm going to have to make sure no-one saw." He began seriously "And do you think Jessica is going to tell anyone?" Teddy thought about it for a bit.

"I don't know. Who'd believe her? She'd probably tell everyone I'm a freak though" He added bitterly and was pulled into a fierce embrace.

"You're not" Harry told him firmly.

"I know" Teddy replied quietly but it was sincere. It had really pained him, what she had said, to hear it come from her lips, but he knew he wasn't and was far too tired to argue with Harry on the matter, especially seeing as he already knew from experience he would lose.

"Did _she_ call you that?" Teddy nodded glumly and looked up in time to see a spark of anger in his godfather's green eyes, but it was soon gone.

"Ted, we may have to erase her memory." Harry looked to Teddy, a stern look on his face. He jumped up, a burst of anger spreading through him.

"What! I finally tell her the truth and you want to take that away?"

"No, I don't, Ted. And I said _might_. But if she can't cope with what she saw..." He reasoned calmly and Teddy felt himself deflate. Remembering how freaked out she was, he saw Harry's point. Teddy met Harry's sympathetic eyes and let himself be pulled back down onto the sofa. "Teddy, if you want to try again, to go after her..."

"What, and have her call me a freak again?" Teddy asked resentfully, before laughing bitterly, "She's probably changed her locks already." Harry put a hand on his shoulder consolingly.

"You know, if it comes to erasing her mind..."

"...She won't know why we broke up" Teddy finished for him. He didn't know quite how he felt about that.

"Perhaps you can wait, just until she has a more open mind" Harry suggested, but Teddy shook his head vigorously.

"No. I'm not going through that again. I can't."

"Then she's not worth it, Teddy" Harry stated and Teddy was taken aback by his bluntness. How could Harry be so sure of that? He only met her couple of time, just Hello and goodbye, the occasional how are you? Nice weather we're having.

"What?" He managed to blurt out.

"I'm not saying anything against her. She had valid reaction to what you showed her. But if she really can't accept you for who you are, Ted..." Teddy gulped his mouth dry, then nodded once, accepting this. "It's not the end of the world ,Teddy… she's just not the one."

Teddy blinked as what Harry said sunk in. He felt Harry give his shoulder a gentle squeeze, and he suddenly didn't feel as bad. She just wasn't the one. _But if she wasn't, who was?_

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><p><strong>Hope this was more satisfactory than the last one. Thank you everyone for all the amazing feedback. On this story and on my poll which is still up. Birthdays is wining at the moment. If you don't know by now, anon reviews are most welcome and will be replied to on my profile when I can. So guys, are you enjoying this? What are your views on Jess? WAYTH is what I'm working on at the mo. Please review! Love you all! –Ami x<strong>


	5. Cursed

**I know I said that Teddy was five when this happened but these chapters aren't necessarily linked. I did say they would be random after all. Sorry for confusion but Teddy is six, close to seven, in ****this.**

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><p><strong>Cursed<strong>

Six-year-old Teddy Lupin sat with his legs crossed on the living room floor of his godfather's home; a home that right now was far too quite - almost eerily so. Said adults were in the doorway, talking in hushed tones as he watched them, waiting. He knew something bad had happened. He could feel it and a part of him thought he knew what it was, but he pushed the thought aside hastily.

He continued to sit there, silently, waiting. He looked down at his pale blue trainers and began to twiddle with the laces. He wrapped it around his thin finger, twisting it this way and that. _Waiting_. He tightened his grip until his knuckle turned white, wondering what they were talking about. Wondering why Ginny had been gripping Harry by the shoulders, as if giving him the courage to do something. Still, he waited.

"Teddy?" Teddy looked up to see his godfather in front of him. He did not smile in greeting as usual, in fact he looked worn and tired. His usually vibrant green eyes were dull and slightly red in his grim face. Harry kneeled down in front of him and took his hands in his gently. "Teddy" he said again, as if it was all he could say. Teddy wanted to ask if he was okay. To ask what had happened, but no words came out. He didn't want to know. If it could make Harry look so utterly miserable, he did _not_want to know.

"Teddy, its, well- it's your Gran" Teddy closed his eyes. He had known it would be to do with her. A part of him had known, had realised that this might happen, but he had never really believed it. He had told himself it would not happen. That she would be fine. "I'm so sorry, Teddy." Teddy didn't open his eyes. He shook his head ever so slightly. This was not happening. "She passed away today" It was all a dream, a terrible dream and he was going to wake up to the smell of his Gran's cookies. "She's been ill for a while now, and..." Harry trailed off but Teddy wasn't really listening.

He felt empty. Completely empty. He felt Harry's hand on his cheek, brushing his hair aside, out of his eyes. "It was peaceful, Teddy, just like falling asleep. She wasn't in any pain."

Teddy imagined her floating away, dressed in heavenly white, drifting away from him. "She'll be with your parents now, and she'll be watching over you. She'll always be with you, Teddy." Teddy let Harry's soothing voice wash over him, not really taking it in. A single tear rolled down his cheek, and he felt himself be pulled into a warm embrace. The tears came thicker, faster, and yet he still felt nothing. He figured he should feel _something_.

His Gran was _gone_. She wasn't coming back. He wasn't going to see her again, to taste her cooking, to have her fussing over the state of his clothes. She was no longer going to pick him up again after tripping over yet another random furniture leg. She was never going to tut at the messes he would make, or tuck him in at night or embarrass him in front of his friends when she insisted on a kiss goodbye. And yet he felt nothing. No pain, no dull ache in his heart. He felt empty.

He let Harry rock him gently as he cried silently. He half-listened to his godfather's muttered reassurances and words of comfort. "...I'm here for you Teddy. I'm going to take care of you. I-"

"No!" Teddy cut him off, the word leaving his lips before it had even formed in his mind. Harry pulled him away a little so he could look at him; his eyes were shining with concern and worry. "You're not" Teddy continued, his voice barely a whisper. Dread was flooding into him. Panic taking over him, clinging onto his senses.

"Not what, Teddy?" Teddy licked his dry lips and looked down unable to meet Harry's eyes.

"You're not going to take care of me"

"What?" Harry was taken by surprise. He had been anxious about telling Teddy ever since he had found out, but he had never expected Teddy to doubt _that_. "Teddy, of course I am. I'm going to be there for you. Look, I don't want to you worry about such things, okay? Me and Ginny will sort all that out. You don't need to worry about anything else right now."

Teddy had to admit he didn't really feel up to thinking at all - in fact, his emotions were very much in control right now.

"Don't I get a say in it?" It was _his_ life after all.

"I –well, yes, but not right now, Ted. You've just found out. We'll discuss it later, yeah?" Teddy very much wanted to agree with this, but he couldn't. Later would be too late. He had to do this now.

"I want to leave" He declared, his voice coming out strong, but still thick with tears. Harry nodded and took his arm lightly.

"Okay Teddy, I'll take you upstairs to your-"

"No." Teddy cut him off again, stubbornly. He sat up straighter, determined. "I want to go home" Harry sighed deeply, the concern in his eyes brighter than before as he told Teddy softly,"Teddy, there's no one there"  
>Teddy gulped at this, his throat dry. Did he really want to go back to his house to find it so...empty? Everything there would remind him of his Gran. Most of the stuff there was hers. Some of it was his mothers. His Gran was just another person to add to the ones he had lost. His house was becoming a collection of dead relative's things. He stopped himself before he could nod in agreement.<p>

"I don't care." Harry looked at him carefully, searching for something in his eyes and Teddy tried not to look away.

Harry figured that Teddy just wanted to feel nearer his Gran, or to spend one last night in his old home.

"Ok, tell you what. I'll come over with you and-"

"No" Teddy interrupted him again. He could tell Harry was trying to be understanding, that he knew not to be impatient.

"Ted- I can't leave you in a house on your own." His godfather told him firmly, before reasoning, "Ginny can come over too, or instead- if that's what you want" He said the last with a hint of hurt, wondering why Teddy didn't want to be around him so suddenly.

Teddy just shook his head.

"Ted, I know you're confused right now..." _hell, I'm confused_, he added silently.

"I just- I just want to leave. On my _own_" Teddy whispered emphasizing the last. Harry just shook his head.

"You can't be on your own. I mean, I can leave you alone _now_, if that's what you want but, you can't take care of yourself"

"I- I can!" His voice shook as he said it, but there was a fierce, determination in his eyes that slowly grew amber.

"Oh Ted." Harry sighed again. "_Please_ don't worry about it. I'm your Godfather and I'm going to- I _want_ to t-" He didn't want Teddy to think that he was only going to take care of him because he _had_ to. But because he wanted to, because he cared so much about his godson and he was never going to let him feel alone.

"I don't" Teddy bit out fiercely.

"What?" Harry thought he had heard wrong. Didn't Teddy want to be with him?

"I don't want you to take care of me" Teddy said each word, slowly and clearly between deep breaths. Harry shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts, convincing himself that Teddy didn't mean it.

"I know you want to be with your Gran..." He trailed off, at a loss to how he could comfort his godson.

"No, I don't want _you_ to take care of me!" Harry was stung, temporarily paralyzed by the sharp words. He swallowed before finally asking,

"Why?"

"Because...because I don't- I don't..." The words just wouldn't flow from his mouth. A part of him was stopping him, yelling at him to not speak those unspeakable words, forbidding him from ever uttering them.

"What Ted? What is it?" Harry was trying not to sound panicked, tilting Teddy's chin up so he could meet his eyes. Teddy looked up at Harry, his huge brown eyes full of tears, and whispered,

"I don't love you anymore."

He might as well have drawn a dagger and plunged it into him, for Harry felt, as he watched his godson get up and run from the room, that Teddy was taking his heart with him.

* * *

><p>Teddy lay there, still and quiet. His shallow breathing was the only thing that broke the silence of his room. He strained his ears, listening out into the night. It was pitch black, but seeing in the dark was easier than most found when you had the ability to adjust your eyes, although at only six he hadn't completely mastered this ability, so the torch he had on his bedside table was a relief to have.<p>

Slowly but surely he eased out of bed, stood up with his torch and lifted up the mattress to reveal where he had stashed his change of clothes. Changing quickly and as noiselessly as he could, he tipped-toed his way to the end of his bed, glad that his room was clean for once. He made it, cautiously, to his wardrobe. He found the handle and pulled it open slightly. A horrifying squeal came from the hinges and Teddy cursed himself having forgotten about the racket his wardrobe could make.

He stayed frozen, imagining the sound of footsteps coming towards his room. His door would swing open and light would flood in and he would be caught like a dear in the headlamps- or some muggle phrase to that effect. But nothing happened, and he let out his breath.

He knew it was foolish what he was doing. It was crazy and scary, but he knew of no other option. He knew Harry; he knew how stubborn he was. He was also painfully aware of how much Harry cared for him. But how could he care for someone who was not there? And Teddy Lupin did not want Harry's care in the slightest. So he was leaving.

He stooped down and picked up his rucksack he had packed hastily. He knew there was nowhere near enough to live off in his small Puddlemere United bag but he was planning to go home- to his Gran's old home. He blinked back the tears thinking of his Gran. He remembered what Harry had said. About her, 'going peacefully'. That she was with his parents.

And with that thought burning in his mind like the torch lighting his way, he slung the bag on his back and made his way out of his room and onto the landing.

Teddy had never really liked the quiet. It was sinister, where a loud noises were more – well, they were easier to identify, to know where they were coming from. And that was much better than not knowing where things where or where they were coming at you from.

He creeped his way down the stairs, one by one, being careful to avoid the creaky bit to the fifth one. He made it down the stairs, by some miracle, without a single sound. And then he saw it - there was a light peeking out from the kitchen door. He should have known though that his luck wouldn't have lasted.

Teddy slumped, his backpack suddenly seeming heavier than it had been moments ago. There was no way he was going to get out without going through the kitchen, or without attracting the attention of whoever was in there. There would be no leaving tonight. He would have to try again tomorrow. It would be more difficult, he knew, but the longer he left it, that harder and harder it would be to leave.

Teddy was about to turn back when he heard the familiar voice of Ron, who was basically like an uncle to him in a way, float from under the door.

"Come on, mate, go upstairs and lie down. You look terrible!"

"Gee, thanks Ron." Teddy was about to smile at Harry's sarcastic comment but stopped himself. Ron sighed loudly and tiredly, before protesting again.

"You need sleep!" Teddy could imagine that the worry for his friend was being shown in his eyes. Thought he tried not to imagine how awful Harry must look to make Ron sound so concerned in the first place.

"I'll sleep here" Teddy had to strain his ears to hear the drowsy words.

"Here? Why?"

"Just in case I guess." Teddy closed his eyes as he listened in, picturing Harry shrugging.

"In case _what_?" Came a dubious reply. There was a long pause before Harry spoke again, sounding far older that he was.

"Teddy might try and run away." Teddy tensed at that, glancing guiltily at the flashlight in his hand. How was it that Harry knew him so well? Even better that _himself_ sometimes? It had always been irritating and yet wholly comforting to know he'd always have someone to understand him.

"What? That's crazy." Teddy winced at Ron's shocked tone, feeling guilty again. "Come on, Teddy loves it here. And besides, his Gran just died; surely the kid would want all the comfort he can get." Teddy looked down at that, trying not to flinch at the almost casual way it had been said.

"I know," Harry agreed sadly, "But he doesn't want to be here anymore." Teddy's stomach twisted at how upset Harry seemed.

"What gave you _that_ idea?" There was a muffled clinking sound as if someone one was picking up some glasses.

"He told me. Said he wanted to go home" Teddy sighed at his godfather's gloomy reply. He didn't _really_ want to leave.

"That's understandable, I guess" Another couple of clinks and the quick short burst of a running tap.

"Yeah, I know. But it was like he hated the idea of being stuck here. The idea of me, well- taking care of him. He basically refused!" Harry's voice rose slightly toward the end and it seemed to hitch somewhat, betraying that hurt behind the words.

"That doesn't sound like Teddy." Ron intoned thoughtfully after a while. "He adores you." Harry snorted at that. Teddy looked down, remembering what he had said to Harry. "What is it?" Ron prompted, confused by the reaction. There was another long pause, more agonising than the last.

"He- He- I think he blames me" Harry finally admitted, and Teddy tried to stifle his gasp. That wasn't what he thought at all. How could Harry think that? It was nowhere near _his_ fault.

"What? You mean for Andromeda-" There was no verbal reply and Teddy guessed Harry had simply nodded for Ron burst out, "Don't be stupid! How could you be responsible? She died of natural causes. She was ill. And don't think Teddy thought you could save her or something ridiculous like that. He may be six, but he's not stupid."

Teddy felt a warm gratitude towards Ron for his outburst. He was glad someone was talking sense into his godfather. He knew Harry could not have saved her, and he did not want Harry to blame himself in any way. He didn't deserve that.

"Then why does he hate me so much?" Harry retorted thought not furiously but, to Teddy surprise, there was a keen desperation there that Teddy had never heard from him.

"Hate you? What the hell are you talking about?" Although he was talking as if Harry was mental, there was unease clear in his words.

"He told me-" Harry stopped abruptly, before letting out in a kind of horrified whisper, "he said he doesn't love me anymore, Ron."

"Oh," was all Ron said. Teddy was looking at his shoes, reciting over and over in his head that it would be worth it. It would all be worth it.

"I don't understand!" Harry cried suddenly and Teddy's head snapped up. "What have I done? Or was it something I didn't do? Did I say something wrong? Or- or am I- am I _that_ bad a godfather?" He sounded on the verge of tears and Teddy felt a sickening self-hatred wash over him. _It will be worth it... it will be worth it..._

"You need to calm down, mate. Look, it's been a long day. The kids probably just upset, and who can blame him? Can you say you were all that emotionally balanced when Sirius died?" Ron reasoned. There was a quick beat of silence in which Teddy could only imagine to look that had came over Harry's face. "Sorry, I'm just saying-" Ron began hastily but Harry cut him off with a deep sigh.

"Yeah, I get it. You're right. I'm getting worked up over nothing." Teddy sighed happily, glad that Harry was feeling a bit better. "He doesn't mean it. Right?" Teddy blinked wondering if he had misheard the almost child-like appeal for reassurance from his Godfather.

"Of course he doesn't. You two are so close, it'll take to hell of a lot more that this break up what you to have" Something clicked then in Teddy's mind, knowing Ron was right. Harry was never going to truly believe that Teddy had suddenly stopped loving him.

"Yeah, your right"

Teddy nodded to himself, and in a haze he made his way back up to his room where he fell asleep, a terrible idea already forming in his mind.

* * *

><p>Teddy rolled over in his bed and groaned as sunlight streamed into his face from the gap in his curtains. He slowly opened his eyes and took his surroundings in, before quickly closing them again soundly refusing to accept that he wasn't in his other bedroom, the one across the hall from his Gran, but he knew it was no use. He knew it was all real and he was just going to have to deal with it.<p>

His head throbbed terribly as he thought of what had happened the day before. Everything had changed, and so quickly. He groaned again and tried to sit up. Tears threatened to spill out as he thought of his Gran. He wanted her back so badly.

But he didn't let them. He didn't have the right to break down, to sob himself hoarse. No, he had a job to do. It was going to stop. He was not going to allow it to continue anymore. He knew his feeble attempt had not worked, was never going to work. So he would have to try a different approach. He hopped out of bed, a new kind of energy taking over him.

Fortunately, he was still wearing his clothes from last night so he didn't have to get changed. His bag was all ready. He knew that he probably wouldn't need it today, but really it did not matter now if he stayed or not. If he did his job well he would not be wanted, and that's all that mattered.

He shivered at the thought of not being wanted. It saddened him greatly. It was such a horrible thought that he hesitated by the door, wondering if he really should go through with it. _It will all be worth it...it will all be worth it..._ he chanted in his head, giving him the strength to turn the door handle and make his way down the hall.

He paused outside Harry and Ginny's room and listened. Silence. He knocked. Nothing. He tried the door and it opened with ease. He popped his head around the door to look inside. Empty. He breathed a sigh of relief and, shaking, he closed the door behind him. His heart was beating wildly in his chest. He tried to tell it to calm down, but it refused.

The room was warm and inviting, pictures plastering the walls and flowers in the window that had its curtains neatly drawn. The slight chill that he had felt in the hall had vanished upon entering.

Doing his best to ignore the insistent thudding inside him he moved quickly over to a chestnut chest of draws, deciding the faster he did this the better. Harry, he knew, was a lot like him. They both had similar pasts. Teddy pulled opened the bottom draw, and sure enough at the very bottom was a beautiful leather bound photo album.

Teddy's hands trembled as he picked it up. Tears splashed onto the cover and Teddy gently brushed them aside. It was ironic how gentle he was being given what he was about to do. He knew how precious it was to Harry. How much comfort and joy it must have given him, still did. He felt the same about his own photo album containing pictures of his own parents. He felt burning rage at the idea of anyone ever messing around with his and so he knew Harry would be equally angry. Teddy shuddered at the thought.

He picked up the album out of its home and closed the draw. But before he could turn around, something on top of the chest caught his eyes. It was a lovingly framed picture. Teddy smiled as he remembered it, the day it was taken. That wonderful day at the beach, just him and Harry. He remembered thinking that day, as he did so often, _what would I do if I lost you?,_as they ran into the water.

It was coming now though. He was going to lose him today he knew that, had planed it even. It hurt, it hurt like hell, but he also knew, _it would be worth it..._

He tore his gaze away from the photo and made his way over to the fire place in the corner of the room. Most rooms in the house had fireplaces, for floo emergency purposes. It was mid December so the fire was alight, just as he knew it would be. He sat down in front of it, watching the red flames flicker, sometimes glowing orange, showing off its yellow tinge as they danced.

Teddy opened the book slowly, as if the thing was the most fragile thing he had ever held and turned it to the first page. A beautiful woman, with long ruby red hair that scattered everywhere in the wind as she laughed, lit up the page. Her cheeks were rosy, her smile warm and guilt engulfed him as he gazed into her soft emerald eyes, ones that she had passed on to her son.

He imagined those kind eyes narrowing at him, flickering with anger. She wasn't laughing anymore she was mouthing furiously, _'how could you do this! How could you hurt him like this!'_

"I'm sorry, but- I have to" He whispered back to her. Tears fell onto her rosy face, blurring his vision.

"Teddy?" Teddy jumped, shooting up, the book when flying into the air, tumbling towards the fire. Teddy gasped, and was about to catch it, but stopped. He blinked, then realised the book wasn't moving anymore, but was merely suspended in midair. Teddy stared at it for a while, before slowly reaching out to it. He took it, pulling it close to him.

"That was close"

Teddy turned slowly to see Harry standing there, wand out, a look of pure relief on his face. Their eyes met briefly. Teddy looked away. "Ted? What are you up to?" His voice was soft, curious but Teddy winced.

"Just- Just looking" Harry's eyes narrowed as he looked at his Godson's guilty face, but he smiled all the same.

"It's fine, Teddy, I don't mind you looking at it, thought it would be better if you didn't sit so close to the fire with it" Teddy nodded, still looking down, not moving as Harry walked over to him, closing the door behind him, and sat down. He patted the space next to him on the carpet and Teddy silently sat by him, staring off into the fire.

"Do you mind if I look at them with you?" Harry asked him kindly, though there was a slight awkwardness between them, a tension that was not usually there. Teddy simply nodded and opened the book. He quickly turned the first page over not wanting to see Lily Potter's accusing eyes glaring up at him. Harry made no comment on this but merely smiled down sadly at the picture of his young mother and father, their arms round each other, waving up at the camera.

Teddy glanced up at Harry, watching him. He scanned his Godfather's eyes and saw the sadness there, the same wistful look he knew that must appear on his own face when he looked at the images of _his_ parents. His stomach twisted painfully at the thought of Harry joining them.

"Teddy, you can talk to me" Teddy hadn't realised Harry's gaze had shifted to him, but he did not look away now. There was a warm trusting look in his Godfather's eyes, and Teddy knew he could tell Harry anything and he would not be judged. He knew that Harry would be there no matter what, unconditionally there to hold him. It was such a powerful feeling to know someone could love him so deeply, and he felt nothing but the same in return. He knew he would never be able to feel any differently. He was not the only one touched by this thought. He was not the only one depending on that love.

Harry had Ginny. And very soon he was going to have a son of his very own. That kid was going to need a dad. He did not like the idea of this kid having to go through the same as him, even if it was only half - but then again, it might be more than that, giving how broken Ginny would be, and they were not the only ones. He thought of Ron, Hermione, George, Luna...the list when on and on...

He could not allow it. Something so strong, unbeatable rose up inside him, like lava shooting up in a volcano, the idea of Harry being gone from the world hit him hard, the thought of his Godfather joining his Parents and his Gran- and it could happen anytime now- made him grasp the album tightly and fling it towards the fire, it did not matter if it missed, the action alone was enough.

"NO!" Teddy scrambled back, closing his eyes tight at the sound of Harry's shocked and anguished cry. It was happening, he had done it. Harry was safe.

Harry grasped the album, yanking it way from the fire. He blew hard, desperately, on the smouldering corner. The small feeble flame died out and he quickly retrieved his wand and waved it over the book. He tried not to sigh in utter relief, knowing he should reserve it for when he looked inside. He opened in cautiously, praying frantically that the pictures were intact. He flipped through every page quickly and once assured all was fine, he let his breath out.

He couldn't stand the idea of them being gone. So many memories disappearing in flame before his very eyes. He felt sick. He couldn't understand. Hurt burned in him that Teddy would want to do such a thing. Teddy. Of all people, he should understand how much the book meant to him.

He felt a surge of anger at the thought of his Godson using that knowledge against him. His _Godson_, Teddy. He couldn't help the betrayal he was feeling, though he knew it was wrong. That he shouldn't be mad. At all. Teddy's Gran had just _died_. He had torn Dumbledore's office apart when Sirius had died. Who was he to judge?

Teddy _needed_ him. He was just a kid. He had been through so much already. The small boy was curled up in a ball by his bed, shivering. All negative feeling towards him vanished in a second as if they had never been there. Forgetting the book he hurried over to him.

"Teddy?" Teddy flinched away, sniffing. Harry felt he could cry seeing his Godson so scared, scared of _him._ He pulled Teddy in close to him, ignoring his godson's protest. "It's ok, Teddy, I'm not mad. It's okay. Don't be scared." He felt Teddy relax into him and he sighed, knowing that right now he would give anything to take away Teddy's pain. To see him happy and smiling again.

"What happened, Teddy?" He remembered the blazing look Teddy had been giving him; there had been so much pain in his eyes, pain that should never be seen in a six-year-old. He thought back to what Ron had said about Teddy not blaming him, but right now it was hard to believe.

Teddy didn't reply and Harry rocked him gently. They sat like that in silence for what seemed like ages, before Teddy murmured weekly, "Do you hate me?" Harry didn't even have to think, the response was instant.  
>"Not in a million years, not even then"<br>"Why?" Teddy seemed miserable by the thought and again Harry was left completely lost. Shouldn't he be worrying about Teddy despising him? Not the other way round. And why would Teddy _want_ him to hate his own godson so badly? Who _wanted_ to be hated? These weren't normal feelings.

"Teddy, listen to me." Teddy looked up at the command without thinking. Harry looked back at him, brushing his tears aside. "I am never going to hate you. _Ever_."

"But I burnt your-" Teddy began to protest but Harry cut him off,

"That doesn't matter. I'm not saying that it was right what you did, but nothing you do is ever going make me not love you and you're just going to have to accept that."

Teddy deflated, knowing he was waging a losing battle, and as much as those words filled him with warmth they pained him. He'd never felt so helpless in his life. Why couldn't he stop it? His Gran had joined his parents and Harry would soon follow. There was nothing he could do about it. He succumbed to tears.

He let Harry hold him tightly and he clung on, never wanting to let go.

"I'm sorry" He chocked out, trying to put everything into those words. Harry shook his head.

"Forget it, Teddy" But Teddy couldn't forget it. It was so unfair. Why? Why _him_? What had he done? Why was he cursed so? He sobbed harder, thinking he would never stop.

"Breathe, Teddy. Shh, it'll be okay. _Breathe_" Teddy calmed ever so slightly as his Godfather rubbed his back, enough for the breath to stop rattling in his chest, but he still felt unbearable. He tried to calm himself, knowing he should be strong, but icy fear was filling him.

"I don't want you to go too" He breathed. Harry froze.

"What?"

"You're going to go too." It all came gushing out, unstoppable, his voice rising "And Ginny's going to be all alone and the baby won't have a dad and Ron and Hermione will hate me. And- and-" he struggled to continue, but Harry gripped him tightly by the shoulders, something akin to horror in his eyes.

"Teddy. I won't let that happen." He gave Teddy's shoulder a squeeze, making sure their eyes were meeting as he spoke. "I'm not going for a very long time yet. And if anything were to happen it would _not_ be your fault. Not in the slightest" he said that last firmly as Teddy showed no sign of believing him

"It will. I'm cursed!" He all but shouted. "First my parents, then Gran and now you're- you're-"

"No, Teddy. You're wrong. You are _not_ cursed." Teddy opened his mouth to protest, but closed it as Harry pinned him with a _'Don't argue with me'_ look. "You're just a kid. You're parents died fighting for the world we have now and your Gran was very ill. Neither of those thing have anything to do with you being cursed. Okay?" Teddy merely stared at him, not agreeing, his chocolate eyes shining.

"Teddy. I'm not going anywhere, and I don't want you worrying about that, or thinking you have to try and keep me safe. I assume that what you were doing? Breaking our bond or something like that?" Teddy nodded silently, trying not to think about how he had failed so miserably, and yet a part of him was glad he had.

"Well, no-can-do Ted. I'm afraid you're stuck with me." For the first time it what felt like ages a small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. Harry smiled, a little forcefully, back at him. "You know I felt the same. You're probably tired of me saying that." Teddy's smile pulled at the corners a bit. "But I did. I thought I was cursed. Everyone I loved kept dying one by one. But Ted, it was a war. It wasn't me. And it gets better. I know it doesn't stop hurting, but, well, you stop trying to destroying things..."

Teddy gave him a sheepish smile at that. Then panicked, guilt returning to him, "Is it- is it-"

"No Ted, the albums fine." Teddy sighed and took Harry's helpful hand up onto his feet. Harry pulled him into a tight hug. "I'm going to take care of you Teddy"

"_I know_" He replied.

* * *

><p><strong>Hey guys! Been a while hasn't it? And I'm afraid it's going to stay that way. I have far too much going on now, and so you won't be hearing form me as much. After this will be a separate one shot then another chap on this after that I'm going to be submerged in work. Wish me luck! Rest assured...I shall return!<strong>

**Please do review, not just because I need to know what you think of this but could do with some positiveness. (I know that's not a word ). I have a bio test tomorrow and I'm freaking out Hope you are a far happier and if you're not best of luck to you! See ya..sometime –Ami X **


	6. Unforgivable

**Hello again fellow readers and writers! Man that was way too formal for me. Anyhow this is probably as much as a surprise to you as it is to me. Finding it in the dusty archives of my laptop was a highlight in my day I can tell you. Hope it makes you feel the same. **

**Sorry for all the doom and gloom in this collection lately, will this 'installment' be more cheerful? Maybe...then again maybe not... actually yea it's not. Well maybe a bit, oh just ****read it.**

* * *

><p><strong>Unforgivable<strong>

The silence that stretched between them was unbearable. There was something that needed to be said, but they just didn't want to say it.

"We're screwed," Ron breathed out at last. Harry frowned.

"I wouldn't put it _quite_ like that." Ron raised an eyebrow at him from across the office and Harry sighed deeply, admitting defeat.

"We _are_ screwed" He grudgingly agreed. The two Aurors lapsed back into silence, their minds swirling with possibilities, scenarios and wild ideas. Ron suddenly leapt to his feet, his eyes shining wide. Harry couldn't help the hope rising in him at the sight. "What is it?" he prompted desperately. Ron opened his mouth to share his wonderful idea, but then his face fell and he sat back down again. "Nope, still screwed."

Harry let out a groan of frustration and buried his head in his hands. _What are we going to do?_

"Unless..." Ron drew the word out and Harry cautiously peeked up from his hands, wondering if he was setting himself up for another disappointment. But before Ron could continue the office door slammed open, bouncing of the wall with a _thump!_

Ron and Harry had leapt to their feet, wands at the ready - and promptly burst into uproarious laughter, for a very flustered looking young man was lying face flat on the floor, his turquoise hair standing up wildly in all directions. He hastily got up, blushing furiously, his green eyes blazing with joy even as he groaned. His hair melded red then pink in a blink of an eye as he waited for them to compose themselves. Ron, who had doubled over on the floor, had gotten up, wiping tears out of his eyes, and grinned at the irritated look Teddy was shooting in his direction.

"Sorry Ted!" Harry gasped out through his laughter. _At least he had managed to stay off the floor._

"I'm not! We needed that, thanks Ted!" Ron leaned back against his desk, still clutching his stomach.

"Glad I could be of service," Teddy drawled, rolling his eyes, before grinning again as he remembered why he had burst into the office - so wildly that he had tripped over his robes and face first into the room - in the first place. "I passed!" he burst out unable to contain the news any longer. Harry arranged his face into one of confusion, trying not to laugh at how his Godson was practically jumping up and down. "Passed? Passed what?"

Teddy gaped at him, eyes no longer the twinkling vivid green but a dull brown.

"What do you mean, _passed what_? What have I been training for, for _two_ years now! I'm a bloody Auror!" A silence followed in which Ron and Harry looked at each other blankly. Teddy could have sworn there were some cliché crickets hiding in the office somewhere.

He couldn't help but feel stung. This wasn't the reaction he'd expected at all. You'd think they would at least be _happy_ for him, proud that all that hard work had paid off, that he was finally following in his mother's footsteps. Their faces split into ones of identical mischief, something that didn't bode well for Teddy as he was tackled by two fully grown Aurors.

"Ow! Get off!"

"Knew you could do it Ted!" Ron yelled in his ear.

"We all knew! I'm so proud of you!"

"Seriously guys, get off!"

"Wait till we tell the others!"

"My little Teddy's all grown up!"

"Shut up!"

"Celebration time!"

"You're...suffocating- I can't..._breathe_!"

They finally released him, just as he started to turn blue, Ron jumping up first.

"I'll go tell mum, were going to have a party!" He enthused, his stomach already grumbling in anticipation.

"What no- no, you don't have to-it's fine, don't go to the trouble-" Teddy stuttered wildly blushing again. Ron rolled his eyes and turned on Harry in mock-fury.

"He gets that from you,"

"What- no-how?-he doesn't- _what_?" Harry stammered, shaking his head and sounding exactly like Teddy had earlier. Ron simply gave him a superior look, as if to say '_see what I mean_'. Harry glared at him. "I thought you said you were leaving?"

Ron held up his hands in surrender. "I can take a hint." He then turned to Teddy, slapping him on the back - "Congrats Ted!" - and back to Harry, once again looking serious.

"We'll meet up with Hermione later yea? Maybe she can help us out," Harry nodded fervently hoping the same. "See you back at the Burrow!" he called over his shoulder as he closed the door behind him.

"You're still stuck on the Mitchell case?" Teddy couldn't help but ask. Harry shook his head despairingly.

"It's not as bad as that damn Vampire fiasco we had last year-" Teddy shuddered at that, trying not to remember how badly injured his godfather had been, how long it had taken to find him or how close he had come to losing... he shook himself sternly. It had almost put him off being an Auror for good, but in the end he just became more determined to protect the people he cares about.

"…But yeah, it's pretty bad." He shot Teddy a reassuring grin, before continuing:

"We'll be alright Ted. We haven't failed yet. But we'll have plenty of time to talk about stuff like that later." Teddy nodded, knowing even now that he didn't want work to seep into his personal life too much.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there when you got your results Ted."

Teddy shrugged and took a seat next to Harry on Ron's desk, that had been cleared before to lay a map down, but now the map too was gone. "It's fine. It's not like you were partying instead."

Harry grimaced in agreement before wrapping an arm around his godson's shoulders and gave them a squeeze. "I really am proud of you."

"Thanks," Teddy's hair was slowly turning pale pink and Harry smirked at the sight, but decided not to say anything least it turned shocking pink in complete embarrassment.

Teddy looked down at his hands his mind swirling with thoughts. He had been waiting so long, working so hard for this moment. And now it was here. But the bubble of excitement was finally wearing off slowly. Panic and doubt was building up, one thought he had been dreading for a while now was coming to the surface.

"Teddy? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," The reply was automatic.

Harry sighed. "Teddy, you're an Auror now. If you're going to lie to me, at least be convincing."

Teddy sat up at that, feeling a little indignant. "Now, that's not fair, you've known me all my life!" Harry sighed again, conceding the point, but didn't take his eyes off his godson.

"So? What is it?" Teddy was voiceless for a moment, gathering his thoughts together before finally speaking.

"Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with fighting. It's just- what-" Teddy paused before blurting out in a rush "-what if I'm in a situation where I have to- _kill_ someone?"

Harry blinked at him, wondering how he should answer, but before he could, Teddy spoke up again.

"What did it feel like?"

"What did what feel like?"

"When you –no sorry I shouldn't ask that." Teddy had back-tracked mid-sentence suddenly changing his mind. He had been wondering for a while now but he couldn't really ask such a thing.

"No, go on Ted, its okay," Harry prompted. Whatever it was, he didn't want it playing on Teddy's mind. Now more than ever, Teddy needed a clear head. As much as he had never wanted Teddy to pursue such a dangerous career choice, there was no going back now and he wanted Teddy to have no doubts when it came to his work.

Teddy gave him an almost apologetic look before breathing out: "When you killed Voldemort?" Harry's eyes closed briefly.

"I prefer the term defeated." His voice was hollow, seemingly devoid of emotion.

"Right, sorry,"

"You know, it wasn't just me that defeated him. Ron and-" Teddy cut across him - he heard this so many times from his Godfather, that he was only one player in a huge war, but that wasn't what he wanted to know right now.

"Yes, I know, but I mean… well, in the end, the very end, when it was just you and him..."

"I don't- I don't know really. It all happened so fast. Really, if I'm honest, I think Riddle died a long time before then. He - _Voldemort_- by then, he was more of a monster than anything. I can't really describe it, Ted. I know after I was relieved that it was all over. But it felt terrible that it took so long, that it took so much..." His voice had been barely a whisper, but still strong, till it faded out, leaving a far off look in his eyes that made Teddy feel immensely guilty for bringing the topic up.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's fine" Harry told him shortly, and they lapsed into silence again. It was Teddy that finally broke it, continuing like there had never been any lull in conversation.

"So that's the only time you've ever..." Teddy trailed off, knowing Harry knew what he meant. The tormented look that flickered in his Godfather's eyes was enough to know the answer before it came.

"No," Teddy stared at him; a thousand scenarios running thought his mind. He wanted to ask for an elaboration, but he didn't dare, a part of him not wanting to know. To his surprise, Harry kept talking, in the same dispassionate tone as before.

"I was on a raid. Ron was there. We had a small squad with us. I won't go into any details about the raid, but, well, there was resistance and there was this one lad, he was about your age-" He didn't stop, (as much as Teddy wanted to tell him he didn't have to talk about it he couldn't bring himself to interrupt), but Teddy noticed his voice hitching slightly.

"-he just came charging out of nowhere... running at me... and I tried to stun him but he dodged and it missed. The spell hit a fortification of the building and a part of the ceiling came crashing down, right- right on top of him. He was just a kid. Barely out of Hogwarts. Barely a man."

Teddy gave his hand a squeeze, unfortunately aware of Harry's blaming-himself-tendencies.

"It wasn't your fault. It was just an accident. You couldn't have known that was going to happen. You were aiming to stun, _not_ kill."

Harry nodded and smiled a little, if not forcefully.

"Yeah, I know. Sorry, I'm not being very reassuring am I?" Teddy just shrugged.

"Nah, it's fine. I'm glad you're not sugar coating it and telling me it will all be fine. I need to know the reality." This time Harry's smile was genuine.

"Smart lad." Teddy coughed, a pink twinge returning to his hair gain.

"Harry?"

"Yeah?"

"When you k-defeated him, did you- did you use the killing curse?" Teddy found that he couldn't quite meet his Godfather's eyes and tried not to sigh in a strange relief as Harry shook his head.

"No, he was hit by his own killing curse, I just- well it's _very_ complicated and I don't want to go into it. I'll explain another time, Ted."

Teddy nodded, not wanting to press the matter when he had already asked so much about the past, more than he usually dared to when it didn't directly involve his parents. "So you've never used it?" It came out as more of a statement than anything, already knowing that Harry would never use such a spell.

"No, and I never want to." Teddy agreed ardently, trying not to picture, as he did sometimes in his sleep, his parents meeting the curse. Teddy didn't know what made him ask, a part of him wondered why he would bother when he knew that Harry would never, but the words came out all the same.

"What about the others?" Harry winced, and after some hesitance, gave a short nod, not meeting Teddy's eyes.

"_What?_" His voice came out sharper than intended and Harry winced again. "What you mean-_surely_ you haven't. You used _crucio_?" Teddy felt himself hoping passionately that that he was wrong, but then again, would it be any better if it was Imperio? He didn't know which of the two, three even, was worse. They were all unforgivable. Unforgivable; that was their name. _Unforgivable_, and Harry, _Harry _of all people? He wasn't naive. He knew that Harry wasn't perfect, that he made mistakes, that he was human. But this was something else all together; a line he had thought Harry would never cross.

"I'm not proud of it, Teddy."

"On a _person_?" It must have been the look horror and disgust that mingled with the disbelief on Teddy's face that forced the tinge of reproach into his reply. "I didn't use it for fun!" Teddy apologised quickly, wondering with a sickening fear what had pushed his Godfather far enough to do such a thing. He knew that it was very unlikely that Harry had used it as an Auror - it was a lifetime stretch Azkaban, after all. It was more probable to have been during the war. He wouldn't have even been an adult, or at least _just_ an adult at seventeen. What pushed a child to use such a spell; to cause so much hatred that he could even _perform_ it? Could war do that to you?

"Who?" He managed to choke out.

"Bellatrix." Teddy almost growled at the mere name of the woman, but stopped himself as Harry continued. "She'd just killed Sirius."

"I don't blame you," His eyes were dark and stormy, jaw clenched tightly. It was strange how at those few words his disgust at using such a spell had all but vanished. He guessed it was different when you knew the reason behind it. Especially when that reason was so close to home. He tried putting himself in Harry's shoes, and soon enough found himself tugging said metaphorical shoes off frantically, not even wanting to go there. _What if it had been him?_

"I'd have done the same." Harry's head snapped up at that, and began to protest, but was immediately cut off by his scowling godson.

"Don't even bother -don't look so surprised either! You know how much you mean to me." Harry just managed a weak smile, a smile that didn't even begin to show his happiness - rather, he intoned dryly: "I hope you never feel the need."

"Agreed," Teddy nodded to himself before looking up at Harry, who sighed knowing what was coming. Teddy took the sign to mean '_Get it over with, Ted_', and so he did.

"Imperio?"

"When I was seventeen, me, Ron and Hermione had to, well, break into somewhere-" Harry ignored Teddy's newly-raised eyebrow "-and, well, we were getting desperate. It was vital that we got what was inside and- and let's just say I didn't enjoy using it, either of them really- not at _all_. I'm not saying what I did was right or that what was going on at the time really justifies what I did either. And I feel ashamed - I really do." Teddy narrowed his eyes, wondering if there was something Harry was choosing not to say. "But I guess what's done is done and I hope you are never in a situation like- well, _like that_."

Teddy couldn't find it within himself to probe any further and just let what had been told wash over him. He glanced at his Godfather, and was surprised to see Harry staring at him intently.

"What is it?"

"I just, I just hope that you don't think too badly of me now."

"Don't be daft. I think I would if you were _proud_ of what you had done, if you had relished in the idea of using dark curses against people. If you didn't regret it in slightest, then yeah, but you don't, so of course I don't. You're still the same person as you were when I entered this office. I just know a little more."

Harry grinned, looking assured. Teddy couldn't even believe that he had worried about such a thing.

The door was flung open for the second time that day and Teddy wondered how it had survived so long. Ron stepped in, grinning.

"Come on you two, we're all waiting for you at the burrow."

"What do you mean 'all'?" Teddy asked confused. Surely the whole family hadn't gotten together _that_ quickly. Harry rolled his eyes at him.

"Teddy it's results _day_. It's not like we didn't know you were going to get them. We've had this planned for ages. Now come on!" Both Ron and Harry pulled him out the door before he could protest. Not that he would, for he was too busy grinning madly_. Just maybe, sometimes, the Unforgivables can be forgiven after all._

* * *

><p><strong>There ya go folks. Hope it wasn't too depressing. And yes I know after the death of Sirius and in Gringotts was not the only times he had used Crucio and Imperio but I don't think he could bring himself to list <strong>_**all **_**the times he had used Unforgivables to his Godson. The above was bad enough. Anyway please tell me what you think!**

**On a sadder note, I won't have anything up again 'till after May. Sorry guys. Have a wonderful Ester all the same! **


	7. Teddy's sorting

**Hello again! Gosh it's been so long hasn't it? Ah well exams, technical difficulty and the like. I won't bore you with my problems. But I bet you're ready to kill me over Birthdays. But have no fear I have officially started writing again. This is up first because it just came easily to me. See it as my come-back piece. Thank you DramionePerfected for beatering!**

* * *

><p><strong>Teddy's sorting<strong>

_"Good luck!"  
>"Have fun!"<br>"Remember to write to us!"  
>"Don't get into too much trouble!"<br>"See you at Christmas..."_

Teddy kept waving till his family's voices were lost in the wind, Kings Cross becoming nothing but a blur as the train sailed away from the platform. Teddy felt a slight pang of longing as the train rattled below his feet. Giving his trunk a tug, he figured it was best to go find a compartment, but he had barely gone five steps when he heard a well-known voice.

"Teddy?" He turned around and sighed in relief at the familiar face. A pretty brunette girl with a green beret on her head came panting up to him; she looked very red in the face, but her hazel eyes were shining with excitement.

"Hey Lady! You had me worried then. When I didn't see you on the platform..."

"Yeah, sorry about that. We were _so_ late. Barely made it on to the train. Thank God I know how to get onto the platform," She breathed, before pulling him into a quick hug.

"Come on, let's get a compartment before they're all gone."

"Brilliant plan, Ted!" she enthused, leading the way down the narrow corridor. Stopping at the sixth one, Teddy pulled the door open for her.

"After you, my dear Lady."

"Why, thank you, kind sir!" Lady held back a giggle as Teddy closed the door behind them.

"Oh I'm sorry; we didn't know there was someone else was in here."

_"That's alright."_

A boy with long fair floppy hair looked up at them from behind his fringe, like a Wizarding Princess Diana. "Take a seat," He invited politely, gesturing to the seats opposite. They dumped their trunks in the corner, and flopped down beside one another.

"I'm Jones, Ben Jones." Teddy wondered where he had heard that name before, and then mentally shrugged - it was a common name, after all. Lady, however, giggled, earning a strange look from Teddy, which she ignored.

"I'm Lady Duehurst and this is my friend Teddy Lupin. You're a muggle-born as well, then?"

"My Dad's a muggle," Ben explained, "I think you might know of my mum, though." Seeing Teddy's puzzled look, Ben continued. "She worked as an Auror." And then it clicked.

"You're Lucinda's son!"

"Yeah, me and my brother Blake. It's nice to meet you both,"

"Pleasure." Lady grinned. "What house do you want to be in?" Teddy was grateful that he was friends with Lady; she was an expert at navigating away from uncomfortable conversation. He had only met Lucinda once and she seemed like a kind, bubbly sort of person. He was six or seven when she had passed away, but he remembered Harry not being able to crack a proper smile for weeks on end, sometimes just shutting himself away in his study for hours at a time.

"What about you, Teddy?"

Teddy shook his thoughts off. "Sorry, what?"

"I asked you, what house you want to be in?" Ben repeated.

"Oh right. Well, I'm not completely sure, to be honest. My mum was a Hufflepuff, my Gran a Slytherin, my Granddad a Ravenclaw and my Dad a Gryffindor."

"Wow, you could go any way!"

"Yeah, I guess." Teddy shrugged. "I'd like to be in Gryffindor, most my family was."

Ben frowned. "But you said-"

"I mean the Potter's and Weasley's." Ben nodded in understanding.

At around ten past twelve there was a knock at the door. Lady slid it open to reveal an elderly lady pushing a trolley laden with sweets and pastries.

"Anything off the trolley, dears?" She inquired.

"I'm good thanks," Ben declined as Lady stood up eagerly, determined to have some of everything.

"Just some Pumpkin pasties for me, thanks." Teddy just was retrieving some sickles from the depths of his pockets when a new voice popped out of nowhere.

"Um, do you have any Mars bars?" Teddy looked over to see a tiny girl, whose long blonde locks were being held out of her eyes by several bright, fluttering butterfly hair clips. Teddy felt a bit dizzy just watching them. The women just smiled at her, as if she got asked this a question lot.

"I'm sorry dear, we don't sell those. How about some Every Flavour beans?" She suggested, holding out a colourful box to the girl.

"What are they?"

"They're a bit like Jelly Beans, really, but they come in every flavour." Teddy explained, seeing the girl eye the box wearily. "Like grass, toast, beans,-"

"Coconut, apple pie, chocolate..." Lady chimed in and finally smiled as the blonde held her hand out for the box, "...Bogeys, dirt, earwax..." – with which the girl quickly withdrew it again.

"I think I'll pass thanks." The girl turned and scurried back into her compartment. Teddy finished paying and the woman rattled onwards, the train echoing with her call: "Anything off the trolley?"

Teddy was about to close the door again when: "Ugh, what a horrible sight." A girl, slightly taller than him, with deep brown ringlets, stood in the doorway staring at him as if he was moldy bread.

"Don't be so hard on yourself, we all have our bad days," Teddy responded acting empathetic. Lady glanced at the girl, as if worried she was going to pull her wand out and curse him into oblivion. To her surprise, the newcomer burst into peals of laughter.

"Oh Teddy! How I've missed you…"

"How was the Caribbean?" The girl's eyes lit up and she quickly closed the door behind her.

"Oh it...was..._amazing_! Truly amazing!" She sat down next to Ben, who looked a little startled by her abrupt manor. "I was miserable without you, though." she continued, "It was almost like having you there." She flashed Teddy a grin and asked before he could retort:

"Who's your friends then?"

"Well, I've told you about Lady," Teddy jerked a thumb at Lady.

"Of course! Wonderful to meet you at last!"

"Likewise," Lady nodded and Teddy could tell she hadn't made her mind up on this new girl yet.

"And this is Ben Jones, who I have just met," Ben gave her a weak smile. "Guys, this is Katie Jordan."

"Well, now that we're all acquainted," Katie reached into her pocket and pulled out a pack of battered playing cards. "Exploding snap anybody?"

...

"Firs'-years! Firs' years over here!"

Teddy stepped out into the dimly lit platform. Lady shivered beside him and Ben passed her his coat.

"Thanks," she murmured, smiling as she put it on.

"Come on guys!" Katie called as she ran over to the large man calling, "Firs'-years follow me!"

"Oh my, who is that?" Lady stopped to stare.

"Don't worry Lady, that's just Hagrid. He looks a bit scary at first, but he's really friendly! He'll be teaching us Care of Magical Creatures." Teddy reassured as he followed in Katie's wake.

"Oh don't Teddy, I told you no spoilers! You're getting me excited!" Teddy laughed as she was practically bouncing up and down.

They followed Hagrid down a steep, narrow path, surrounding by furious whispers of enthusiasm. The path opened wider and there was a loud chorus of 'Ooooooh!" Teddy could hear Hagrid chuckling but he paid it no attention. His eyes we glued to the huge lake that spread out before them like a sheet of black glass, acting as a barrier to the most magnificent thing Teddy had ever seen in his life.

"Hogwarts," a boy beside him breathed. Teddy felt a tremor or excitement as they made their way to the boats waiting for them. He was going to get to the castle, if it was the last thing he did.

"No more than four to a boat!" Hagrid called to them and Teddy stumbled into the one nearest him.

"How are we supposed to fit in there if you're lying in it?" Katie teased.

"Oh shut up, I tripped!" Teddy sat up and helped her in grudgingly.

"Get used to that Ben," Lady giggled beside him, "Teddy's an accident waiting to happen,"

Before Teddy could retort, Hagrid yelled: '**Forward!'**The boat gave a jerk and moved off with the rest of its companions, towards the magnificent castle before them.

...

"Come on now, form a line, don't be shy," Neville- (_Professor Longbottom_, Teddy reminded himself) told them cheerfully, giving Teddy a wink before leading them towards two ancient wooden doors. He ran a hand through his, (thankfully not yellow from all the nerves), hair- a habit he had picked up from Harry. Behind him Lady was smoothing down her robes (they had taken it in turns to get changed) and in front of him a tall boy with long shaggy hair was shivering from head to foot muttering excitedly to himself,

'I fell in, Merlin, wait till I tell Dad! I bloody fell in."

Teddy smiled to himself, slightly bemused, but his smile soon fell as the doors opened and nerves hit him like a fist in the stomach. What if he couldn't be sorted? Would they just send him home? He pushed the silly thoughts aside as they filed in. Several people gasped. He could see why. He couldn't think of a better way of describing the hall but..._magical_.

"Look at the ceiling!" Someone gasped. Teddy did so and tried not to become mesmerised by the swirling stars on the ceiling above, not wanting to miss a thing. The four tables stretched beside them like giant railway tracks. He told himself not to look at them, not to look at the students staring at them, wondering if they would come to their table. He looked, instead, straight ahead at the stool in front of them.

A hush fell over the hall as Professor Longbottom placed an old and battered hat upon the stool. Teddy stared at it curiously and jumped when it moved and -quite strangely- began to _sing_.

_So this time has come at last,  
>A new year has started.<br>You come to me as one,  
>Now to be parted.<em>

_Oh come along and let me sort you,  
>For I am the Hogwarts sorting hat,<br>Created by the founding four, centuries ago -__  
>It was Gryffindor's idea as a matter of fact -<em>_  
>To give me a mind from theirs,<br>To place you into the house that suits you best,  
>By looking into your thoughts,<br>I do not jest._

_Shall I sort you into Gryffindor?  
>With its red and gold gleaming,<br>To be one of the brave of heart,  
>along with the bold and daring?<br>Or maybe you belong in Hufflepuff,  
>It's black and yellow standing proud,<br>The house for the kind, just and loyal,  
>With the strong belief that everyone is allowed,<br>Perhaps you are a Ravenclaw,  
>Your colours of blue and bronze soaring,<br>Your mind is what's treasured most,  
>Being a person of wit and learning,<br>Or do you belong in Slytherin?  
>The house of silver and green,<br>Where the cunning are prized,  
>and ambition is clear to be seen,<br>So don't be nervous now,  
>I do not bite,<br>Put me upon your head,  
>So we can begin the sorting this starry night<em>.

The hall burst into applause and the hat became still once more. Professor Longb- oh to hell with in- Neville stepped forwards with a long parchment, "When I call your name you will sit, put the hat on and be sorted," He smiled at them all before calling, "Aston, Jack!"

It was the boy in front of Teddy that had fallen into the lake. He bounded forwards eagerly and placed the hat on his head. A moment later it yelled, "GRYFFINDOR!" Jack grinned from ear to ear as he was greeted by the students on the table nearest to Teddy.

"Battersbe, Matthew!" This time the hat cried, "RAVENCLAW!" The boy seemed pleased with this.

"Best, Daniel!"

"HUFFLEPUFF!" the table on the far right cheered as he joined them.

"Davis, Emily!" Teddy watched as the timid blonde who had asked for Mars bars on the train walked forwards. The hat seemed to take the longest so far with her before calling,

"GRYFFINDOR!" Teddy was stunned, but found himself clapping her. Perhaps it was to starve of the guilty feeling he had for judging her so soon. Then came Lady's turn. He gave her a gentle push forwards but she needn't of worried, she was soon waving at him from beside Emily.

Joshua Everett became another Hufflepuff and Francesca Fig became the first Slytherin with much clapping form the table to the left of him. Teddy found himself getting more worried as Neville made his way down the alphabet.

Ben took a little longer than Katie's two second sorting but they both made their way proudly over to join Lady. Teddy was really nervous now. What if out of all the kids he'd happened to see on the train he was the only non-Gryffindor? He knew he would be alright in any house but he didn't want to be separated from his friends so soon. He again tried not to look at the table where Ben had already struck up a conversation with the still soaking Jack Aston.

"Kingleton, Stephan!" became a Slytherin as did, "Livingstone, Jonathan!" and finally,  
>"Lupin, Teddy!"<p>

_Deep breaths Ted, you can do this._

He sat upon the stool and soon the hat flopped in front of his eyes.

_Hmmm let's see now..._ a voice sounded in his ear. He managed to stop himself from jumping. _Yes, you certainly don't lack courage, not a bad mind either - but not quite fit for Ravenclaw. Kind, yes, caring- very hard-working oh and extremely loyal, you'd do very well in Hufflepuff. _Teddy wondered if that was it. Should he go over to the Hufflepuff table?

_No, I have not quite decided yet Lupin. You seem relieved by that, you do not wish to be in Hufflepuff?_

'I have nothing against it' Teddy murmured inside his head, 'My mum was in Hufflepuff,'

_Yes, and you wish to make her proud..._

'But my parents would be proud of me no matter what house I'm in,' Teddy muttered back defiantly. The hat seemed to chuckle,

_Wise words you have been told. You seem to be very daring, mischievous streak too...yes...yes I think it better be..._

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Teddy took that hat off and leapt up. Lady, Ben and Katie engulfed him and dragged him down into his seat. Even Jack gave him a clap on the back, grinning like a manic. From across the table a ghost that he supposed to be Nearly-Headless-Nick gave him a wobbly nod.

He looked back over to watch the rest of the sorting; enjoying it a lot more now that he was seated. Ben leaned into him and whispered, "Nearly put me in Ravenclaw, can you believe that?" Teddy smiled back at him. "Hufflepuff for me." Ben nodded and didn't seem to be surprised.

Soon enough, 'Titter, Alexandra!', became another Ravenclaw and 'Zane, Stuart!' was the last ending up in Slytherin.

Headmistress McGonagall stood to welcome the students old and new before clapping her hands twice and seating herself again.

Teddy was still looking at her when he heard Jack cry: "Brilliant!"

Looking down he couldn't help but grin too. This had to be the largest feast he had ever seen. The plates in front of him were filled to the brim with food. Sausages, bacon, turkey, peas, carrots, potatoes, steak, roast beef, lettuce, corn...he couldn't believe his eyes.

"Stop staring and eat!" Katie commanded him and he gladly did as he was told.

"Pass me the gravy please?" The boy directly in front of him asked.

"Oh right, here you go," The boy poured some on his potatoes then offered his hand to Teddy.

"I'm Sam Prattle." He introduced himself somewhat pompously. Teddy opened his mouth to say his name but the boy finished shaking his hand then turned to the fifth year next to him and started asking rapid questions.

"Well, that was rude," Lady huffed quietly next to him. Teddy shrugged.

Ben didn't seem to eat much, but Teddy had never felt so full in his life as he listened to McGonagall explain Quidditch try-outs and reminded them to stay out of the forbidden forest. Teddy had no intention of doing either thing. He liked Quidditch and he was a pretty good flyer and a good chaser but he had no desire to join a team next year, or any year for that matter. As for the forest, he wasn't reckless but he wouldn't forgive himself if he didn't go in there at least once in his time at Hogwarts.

They sung the school song, Lady singing it sweetly beside him and Jack yelling it at the top of his lungs, before a fifth year prefect called Thomas Higgs showed them to their dorm. Teddy was so tired he didn't even notice the eyes that followed him from out their portraits. He called goodnight to Lady and Katie, tripped up the stairs and was dragged up by Ben and Jack who tossed him on to the bed that Teddy identified as his. His stuff was near it, after all.

"Thanks guys," He muttered into his pillow. He was about to go to sleep when he remembered something. Reaching over to his bedside table, he picked up a quill and a bit of parchment and began to write.

_Harry, Ginny, Jamie, Al and Lil,_

_Heya! I'm In Gryffindor! Lady made it onto the train and I met up with Katie as well, we're__all__in Gryffindor. And hey, I met Ben Jones on the train too. Didn't know who he was at first. He seems an alright guy, he's in my dorm too. So is this nutter that fell in the lake- Jack. I haven't stopped laughing since he said hi to me. Anyway, best get some sleep. Big day tomorrow!_

_Hope you're well,_

_Teddy_

Teddy's eyes began to close. Perhaps he would send it tomorrow.

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><p><strong>Hope you liked it, and that it is making up for my absence. Tell me what you think! Oh yea as for Katie Jordon, I believe she is the daughter of Lee and Alicia, who had her pretty young. A year after Teddy in fact when they were 20, unless I'm being stupid. Sorry if you disagree with this. I've really enjoyed developing these characters. There is another poll on my profile if you wish to contribute to my thought processes :-) Yea anyways hope you are all in good health and I'll go write some more...<strong>


	8. We are even, you and i

**We are even, you and I**

Teddy smiled his thanks to the humpbacked witch as he took a coffee from the offered tray. He passed it to the man nearest to him, who in turn passed it along till the sweet smelling liquid was distributed amongst the tired-looking Aurors in the dingy alleyway. The sun's rays were just daring to creep in, elevating the gloomy feel the alleyway created, but only slightly. Teddy took his own steaming mug, thanked the witch again and kicked some glass, from the witch's shattered window, out of his path.

He scanned the alley, his eyes floating over the faces of the blue-robed men and women that bustled about. Some were repairing the damage to the shop fronts, some putting out a small fire on the roof of an apothecary (one that looked like it didn't sell the kind of herbs that calmed you at night), some talking to residents that lived above the shops, busily scratching away at their notepads: all of them familiar, but none the one he was looking for.

Deciding on a different tactic, he soon spotted the red-head leaning against a wall, looking impassively at the shambles of a shopping alley. Teddy noticed that Ron too had a cup of coffee, but he didn't bother asking why he had another one perched on a windowsill.

"Morning Ted," He greeted, but without his usual enthusiasm. "I heard you had a bit of a close call in there." Teddy winced, but was saved commenting by Ben joining them.

"Merlin, would you look at this place? I doubt many people would cry if it all burnt down," was Ben's, unusually pessimistic, greeting.

"The people living here would."

"But _why_ would you live here? So close to Knockturn alley, no less." He took a sip of his own coffee and cast a disdainful gaze over the crooked looking shop fronts. "Merlin-knows what these shops used to sell."

"_Used_ to, Ben. This place could have become a decent area without Knockturn's influence," Ron's voice got bitterer as he continued, "It won't now. Not 'til those bastards stop trying to turn this into their base camp." Teddy understood the bitter tone, feeling sorry for the inhabitants that were almost driven out of their homes, just so villains could turn the small alley into its criminal core.

Ben rolled his eyes. "Why they would want this place I don't know, not with us patrolling Knockturn all the time," Ron gave a laugh that startled Teddy. Ben seemed almost embarrassed, looking down at his boots. Catching Teddy's questioning look, Ron simply told him, "Daniels."

Teddy groaned. So that's why they had had so little warning, why things had gotten so messy. "He won't be happy," Ron just shook his head gravely.

"Speak of the devil," Ben muttered as a loud voice drifted over to them. Several Aurors stopped in their movements, even the dust seemed to settle as if too scared to spiral in the sunbeams.

"What the hell is wrong with you! This is the second time! '_It won't happen again,'_you said! Merlin, why the hell did I trust _you_? Asleep! How the hell can you sleep when criminals are breaking in _one_ alley away from you! Going on a bloody rampage! But you weren't, were you? It's bloody impossible to sleep through that. You weren't _there_! You abandoned your post, you bloody _stupid_ fool! I've never been more ashamed. Get the _hell_ out of my sight!"

"Poor Daniels," Ben murmured.

Ron snorted. "Bloody idiot deserves everything he gets. With a little more warning..." He trailed off, looking at the blackened front of the burnt potions shop. "He's just damn lucky no one got badly hurt."

Teddy was just glad he wasn't the one being yelled at. As if un-pausing a television screen, the Aurors went back to work, some startled, the older ones shrugging as if accustomed to their usually quite Head's sudden burst of anger. A lot of them looked like Ben, embarrassed that one of their own could be stupid. He saw Harry walking towards them and figured by the look on his face that now was not a good time to ask him anything.

"Good morning!" Ron greeted his friend, the only one brave enough to look remotely cheerful.

"If you say so." He grumbled. "What the hell was that idiot thinking?"

"Merlin-knows," Ron shrugged, and then as if suddenly remembering something he clicked his fingers, "Kelly came by earlier, said Remer wanted to see you,"

This didn't seem to improve Harry's mood. "Ugh, Remer - another one who needs a kick up the-"

"Watch out below!" An Auror, helping to put the roof fire out, yelled a warning as the overhang came away from the shop. There was a clanging clatter, and a loud thump followed by a lot of coughing and cursing as dust and dirt was kicked up into the air. "Anyone hurt?"

"Nah, we're good!"

Harry turned back to Ron, "Did he say what he wanted?" Ron shook his head.

"Of course he didn't. Godric, but I'm going to have a word with him. What the hell is he teaching recruit these days? I saw Gaffers using _Stepifode_. What bloody good is that? He might as well have thrown his wand away and punched the guy in the nose for all the damage it did. They're way too reliant on their wands. I keep _telling_ him. But oh no, he won't listen to me. _Bloody git_."

Ben and Teddy shared a look at Harry's rant, trying to keep a straight face. Remer had made their lives a living hell last year. Harry turned on them.

"What are you smirking at, Jones?"

"Me sir? Nothing sir!" Ben's eyes were wide and innocent.

"Good. Do something useful, why don't you?" Harry dug in his pockets and took out some coins. "Go and pay that nice lady that's been giving you ungrateful lot all that coffee." Ben took the coins and hurried off.

"And what are _you_ grinning at?" Harry rounded on Ron but it was clear his anger had evaporated, despite his moody tone.

"You! You're nearly as bad as Mad-eye!" Ron smirked and offered his brother-in-law the coffee that had been kept for him; Harry took it and sipped it to hide his smile.

He turned serious once more.

"Well, maybe I should hide in Lupin's apartment and shout _constant vigilance_ at him," Teddy looked down at his shuffling feet. "What have I told you?"

"Always mind your surroundings," Teddy murmured. He hoped his hair was still sandy-brown and _not_ vivid pink.

"Exactly! Godric Teddy, I'm never going to reach my fortieth birthday if my Godson _insists_ on being impaled by spikes." Teddy blanched at that. He remembered vividly how the medieval-like-spike, dangling from the ceiling like a metal stalactite, had wobbled when hit by a stray curse. He had stood, frozen, staring up at it until grabbed around the waist and hurdled to the side.

"It won't happen again," He tried to inject some confidence into his words, but he couldn't meet Harry's eyes, until his godfather clapped him on the shoulder.

"I'm glad to hear it." Their eyes met Teddy and could see the relief in his green orbs, despite the stern look. He could read the emotions in there so plainly - '_I'm glad you're okay...I couldn't bear losing you' - _but they were quickly gone and before Teddy could ask Harry squeezed his shoulder. "I best be getting back to the ministry. See you both tonight," and with a parting smile he walked away, shouting to Ron over his shoulder: "Keep him out of trouble will you?"

Teddy could just hear him calling amiably to some Aurors that they were doing a good job as he disappeared from the alleyway. One man muttered 'more mood-swings than a bloody girl, that one,' only to be hit over the head by Melody Crawford.

Teddy didn't join in the laughter. "Cheer up Ted," Ron nudged him, "What is it?"

Teddy thought back to the moment inside the old, dilapidated building, when he had been pushed aside.

"He said that we were even," he looked up at the older man, as if expecting an elaboration. Instead, Ron just looked puzzled.

"Even?"

"Yes, when I told him he saved my life. He just said 'I guess we're even now'. What does he mean by that? When have I ever saved his life?"

"Don't ask me Ted. I have no idea what goes on in that head of his. You will have to ask him." Teddy had the feeling that Ron _exactly_ what was going on in his brother's head, but didn't want to be the one to explain it. "Come on, back to work."

* * *

><p>Teddy hated paperwork. It was just so boring and tedious. He looked across at Ben, who was diligently shifting thought the many witness accounts they had been given. At least <em>one<em> of them was doing something useful, he thought bitterly. But he supposed it was all a means to an end. Nothing in this Ministry, he had come to find, gets done without paperwork.

But Teddy simply could not concentrate on the form in front of him. He had his quill poised over the parchment ready to fill it in, so far only writing his name at the top, and the ink dripped from the quill, forming splashes like black teardrops on the paper. Frustrated with himself, he put the quill down and waved his wand at the form to vanish the splodges. Satisfied he decided to have another attempt at filling the blasted thing in.

His eyes had roamed half way down the form before he realised he had taken nothing in. Sighing, he looked back to the top only to notice he had spelt half his words wrong. Fully aware that his name was not 'Tebby Lutin', he gave an aggravated cry and flung the quill back down on the desk. Ben looked up from his own papers and gave him an exasperated look.

"Go talk to him,"

Teddy shook his head. "He's probably busy," and pulled a fresh form toward him.

"You won't get anything done 'til you've talked to him," his friend persisted. Teddy glared back at him without much heat and held up a pile of forms similar to the one he was now struggling to fill out.

"I've done lots thank you very much."

Ben looked at the papers and smirked. "Are you sure that's your work?" Teddy did not like where this was going. Hesitantly he looked at the top of the papers in his hand and his heart sank. "Go talk to him, _Tebby_,"

Teddy gave the blond an annoyed look but sighed knowing defeat when he saw it. "Alright, alright, but I'm telling, you he'll be too busy."

Harry was, in fact, very busy and his annoyance at being disturbed showed on his face as the door opened, but melted once recognizing the intruder.

"Um, are you busy?" Teddy glanced at the piles and piles of forms, files and dockets, maps and rolled up scrolls of parchment that littered Harry's desk, and realised the stupidity of his question. _Told you Ben,_he mentally muttered.

"No," Harry lied. He turned his back on the filing cabinet he had been rummaging through.

Teddy turned to leave. "I'll leave you to it."

"No, come in Ted. I could do with the company," Teddy was about to ask if he was sure but Harry had already closed the cabinet and asked, "Something bothering you Teddy?"

The young Auror scratched the back of his neck, wondering how best to approach the subject. "Last night..."

"What about it?" Harry prompted, when Teddy didn't continue.

"When have I ever saved you life?" Far from being taken aback from the abrupt question, or looking uncomfortable as Teddy thought he might, Harry just smiled softly.

"If you really must know, it was the moment I met you." Teddy blinked, not knowing how to reply to that. How exactly had his baby-self saved a life? Harry saw his puzzled look at sighed, but not in exasperation as such.

"Teddy, what you've got to understand is saving someone's life isn't always about pushing them out the way or diving in front of them to take a curse, I mean, yes, it takes a lot to do that, but sometimes it can be about giving someone their life _back_ to them. To give them a purpose, a reason to care, something to hold on to," Harry spoke with an impassioned sincerity and Teddy felt a lump form in his throat and a warmth at his words, tinged with embarrassment.

"I'm not saying you were to only one there for me, obviously, but everything seemed so much brighter, so much _clearer_ when I held you. I'll always be grateful to your parents for letting me be you're godfather."

Teddy wanted to say he was very glad too, but the lump was still in his throat.

"About what I said, about us being even," Harry shrugged, "I don't know it seems silly now. It's not really quite the same is it?" He seemed to be talking more to himself then anything, so Teddy didn't reply. He was too busy trying to register what he had been told. He knew he meant a lot to Harry, he would be a blind fool not to know that, but enough for Harry to consider it as 'giving him his life back'? He wasn't sure if he could quite grasp that.

"Harry, it isn't silly. You were right, in a way," It was Harry's turn to look puzzled.

"Right about what?"

"We are even, you and I. You say I was there for you, and you were there- _are here_ -" he corrected himself "– for me. If you think that my simply giving you a reason to care saved your life in a way, then I can safely say we are even."

They had given each other just as much as the other. They were equal and they would always be there for each other; a reason to care.

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter was rather unexpected. I'd never planned on writing this, or jumping from him starting school to being an Auror, nor know if it makes much sense, but here it is in any case. Chapter eight out of twenty-three. Yes that's how many I plan to do. I have a thing for planning ahead, and I know that I have a space for chapter 12 so any requests at all I'll pick my fave and use it for that one. I hope to have another one-shot up soon before returning to Birthdays. Please review, College is killing me, send me some love :-) - Ami x<br>**


	9. Who do you think you are?

**Hello everyone. Long time no write. Managed to get this done over the half-term. I had already started it a while ago so it made more sense to finish it then to start on a Birthdays chapter I'd never have time to finish and be satisfied with it. If that makes sense...never mind. I just really wanted to get something up as it's my Anniversary today! Yep, two whole years of writing. Where has the time gone, eh?**

* * *

><p>Teddy let his mind wander, absent-mindedly doodling on the corner of the newspaper clipping. The picture on the front was covered up by his notebook, which had yet to have a single word on. Not that he was worried. He had the slight advantage over his classmates, as you tend to have when you live with the man giving the lecture.<p>

Teddy dragged himself out of his thoughts as a note landed on his pad. '_This is so boring! I know all this already!_' It seemed that Ben, (who had interrogated said lecture-giving-man several times, wanting to know all about his late mother's job), was in the same frame of mind as him. Teddy glanced up at the clock before hastily scribbling a note back. _'It'll be over soon'._

Ben didn't reply and Teddy wondered if his friend had succumbed to sleep. Not that the lecture was particularly boring (in fact, if he didn't have his mind on other things it would be quite interesting) but he knew his friend had been up all night rowing with Lady. They had been at each other's throats lately, something that was rather odd for the calm couple. Teddy soon found his mind travelling back to the library where he had found the article...

"Oh my _Merlin_, Ben! I just sorted that pile out!" Lady snapped. Her heels were now surrounded by a small pool of books.

"I'm sorry okay! I was just trying to help, jeez!" Ben retorted bending down to start picking the fallen books up. Lady also bent down, trying not to step on any of them.

"Yeah, well, you know what? Don't!" She spat.

"Fine," He stood back up and flung himself into the nearest chair moodily. "I'll just sit here then shall I?"

Lady opened her mouth to retort, when a voice came from the other side of the room.

"Oi! Lovebirds! Knock it off!"

"Shut up Jack, it's your fault we're here anyway!" Lady yelled back. Jack dumped the pile of books he had carried on to a nearby desk, nearly choking himself on the dust thrown up.

"What? It was _your_ idea to give the OWL students a _relaxing environment_ to study in." He managed to choke out, making air quotes at 'relaxing environment'.

"And _what _is wrong with that?" Lady seethed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Oh yes! It was a wonderful idea, the candles were the perfect touch...till the whole bloody library nearly burnt down!" was Jack's sarcastic reply.

"They wouldn't have done if you hadn't been acting such an idiot! They were safe until you started flinging those bloody..." Lady's voice trailed off as she noticed the look upon Katie's face.

"Shut up the both of you!" Katie hissed.

"What's your prob-" Jack began, but then followed her gaze. The friends exchanged worried glances. Sitting quiet and still in the corner was Teddy, only half listening to his friend's rants. His mind was racing, he was staring fixedly at the article gripped in his hands.

He had only read some of it. After glancing down the see the journalist, _Rita Skeeter_, he had decided for his own mental health not to continue reading. He wanted real answers, not fabricated fantasies.

"Teddy? You okay mate?" Ben asked softly. Teddy looked up.

"What? Yeah, I'm fine,"

"You don't look it," Jack observed, making his way over to stand beside his friend. "You sure you're alright?" Teddy just nodded distractedly, only increasing the worried looks on their faces.

"Did you guys know about the Tri-wizard Tournament being here?" Teddy finally asked.

"The _what_ now?" Lady asked. Sometimes she hated being a muggle-born.

"The Tri-wizard Tournament. It's a competition between three wizarding schools. It took place a long time ago but was stopped because of the death toll." Jack explained. He had an almost excited gleam in his eye.

"Death toll?" Lady's eyes widened. Katie frowned.

"Hang on, that can't be right; I'm sure it was here when my parents were at school," she informed them, puzzled.

Teddy nodded. "1994-95. I think Harry was in it."

"What? I've never heard that!" Ben sounded his shock.

"That's pretty cool!" Jack enthused. He had already leaned in to read the article. He frowned. "Well, except for the crying over his dead parent's thing."

"I doubt he actually said that, it's not something he'd admit out loud, let alone to the press," Teddy told them quickly. He glared at the paper, glad that he hadn't read further. "Wonder why he never told me..."

Jack passed the article to the others to look, before replying, "Mustn't have come up." He clapped Teddy on the shoulder comfortingly. Katie looked up from the newspaper.

"You can always just ask him. All you have to do is wait a couple of hours, after all."

* * *

><p>Harry gave a nervous cough. He'd come to the end of his lecture. There was silence in the hall. He glanced at McGonagall, who was standing near-by, and she gave him an encouraging smile in return.<p>

"Right, so, um, any questions?" he asked the hall.

Teddy raised his hand, only half his mind truly focused on what he was doing. Glancing up he saw Harry looking straight at him, a fond smile on his face.

"What was it like being in the Tri-Wizard tournament?"

The smile fell. "I-" A soft murmur started to make its way through the hall, growing louder by the second. It took McGonagall's stern voice to drown it out,

"Well, that's all we have time for. I'm sure you'd all like to show your _appreciation_ before you make you way to out." The hall's population seemed to remember its manners and began to clap. Harry murmured a thank you. Teddy had never seen someone leave a room so quickly.

* * *

><p>He felt himself being dragged out of the hall by the current that was his year group. Someone pulled at him, to his annoyance, until he recognized the voice that muttered in his ear: "When I said just ask him, I didn't mean in front of our whole year."<p>

"I wasn't thinking okay?" Teddy hissed back at Katie as they made their way out into the corridor. Ben nudged him. Teddy followed his gaze and could just about make out his godfather standing in the shadowed door way of a nearby class room.

"Hey, Mr Potter, how's it going?" Ben greeted cheerfully once they finally clambered their way over to him.

"It's going good thanks," Harry smiled at them all - he'd long ago given up on getting them to call him by his first name.

Jack gave him the thumbs up and grinned, "Great lecture Mr P. I practically liked the ending!"

"Er, thanks, I think…"

"Ignore him," Katie put in quickly, "he's being him today."

"Hey! What's wrong with being me?" Katie took his arm and slung her other one around Ben.

"Lots and lots of things. In fact, I wrote a list last night; let me show it to you. See you around Mr Potter!"

Teddy rolled his eyes as she practically dragged their friends away, Lady hurrying after them. Harry waved a farewell, his lips twitching.

"Are they usually that subtle?"

Teddy just shook his head fondly. Then coughed much like Harry has done earlier. "That was a good lecture."

"How would you know? You weren't listening." Teddy looked up, but Harry didn't seem to be reprimanding him.

"I had um...other things on my mind," Teddy told him truthfully. Harry sighed then beckoned Teddy to follow him into the room.

"I still can't believe you asked me that," Harry muttered as he close the door behind them, wincing at the squeal it made.

"What's the big deal? It was just a question." Teddy pulled himself up on to a desk towards the front of the class.

"It wasn't even on the topic, it was completely irrelevant!"

"Look, I'm sorry okay? I still don't get what the big deal is," Teddy countered.

Harry wandered over to the window, before saying quite softly, "Teddy, there is a reason, a reason I don't like talking about...about things like that."

Teddy looked down at his shoes. He hadn't meant to upset Harry. But he wasn't about to give up either. "Can you tell me _some_ things? Just the basics?"

Harry looked back at him. Teddy felt like he often did when his godfather gave him _that_ look. The look that made him feel like he was being x-rayed by those green orbs. Harry eventually nodded and took a seat directly in front of him.

"Just the basics. What do you want to know?"

Teddy didn't know where to begin. His mind was bursting with questions. Finally one bullied its way to the front of the queue.

"Who did you compete against?"

"Victor Krum-"

"Wait, the coach for the Bulgarian Quidditch team?" Teddy interrupted, sitting up a little straighter.

"Yeah, that's him," Harry confirmed. "Fleur," Harry paused, this time expecting the interruption.

"Fleur? As in Vic's mum?" Teddy tried to imagine his graceful, floaty, girly 'aunt' being in a rough and tough death-encouraging tournament. It was hard enough imagining that, let alone seeing her compete _against_ Harry. There weren't quite brother and sister but the two always seemed to have a certain... _understanding_ between them. One that Teddy never sensed between Harry and his other sister-in-laws. Maybe the tournament was the reason they had that connection, Teddy mused.

Harry simply nodded, unaware of his godson's revelations. His eyes seemed to cloud over.

"And Cedric Diggory."

Before an uncomfortable silence could claim the room Teddy gently prompted, "You mean the Hufflepuff student that died at the beginning of the second war?"

Everyone in the wizarding world knew that Cedric died at the very beginning; after all he was at the very top of every war memorial and shining plaque. Teddy had seen for himself in the ministry, in school (in fact he was pretty sure they were only a corridor away from the nearest one) in several different grave yards–Cedric Diggory was always at the top.

"Yes." Harry said no more and, as curious as he was, Teddy decided to move away from the topic of Cedric, not liking Harry's far off look.

"Hang on that's four. Isn't it supposed to be '_Tri'_-Wizard and all that?"

"It was supposed to be like that but- well it's complicated." Teddy had a sinking feeling that they were quickly coming to the end of the 'basics' part of this topic. He tried a different question - "What was the first task?"

Harry took a breath, pulling himself together. "We had to get past a dragon and steal this egg it was protecting."

"Bloody hell! A dragon. That's amazing! How did you do it?" Harry couldn't help a small smile at Teddy's wide-eyed look.

"I flew," was Harry's simple answer. He seemed determined to elaborate as little as possible. But Teddy could still imagine it happening.

"Brilliant! What then?"

"Well, the egg turned out to be a clue. I had to hold it under water to hear the message properly. It was a song in Mermish," he added upon seeing Teddy's confused look. "And it told me that something I would sorely miss would be taken and I would have an hour to find it."

Teddy pondered this. What would he sorely miss? Being upset would be a big understatement if he lost the photo album he had of his parents. He was also fond of his adventure books, but what would he miss the _most_? He looked back up at his Godfather,

"Was it Ron or Hermione?" Harry smiled, a little impressed (but not surprised) that Teddy had understood so quickly.

"Hermione was already taken. Krum really liked her," he chuckled.

"Seriously?" Teddy didn't know why he was so shocked. There had been a time before Ron and Hermione got together after all. He was just being so used to them being together, the idea of either of them ever being with someone else was quite alien to him. It was as if they had popped into existence as a married couple. He still couldn't for the life of him imagine Ginny with Dean from the DMLE or Harry with Cho, even if the latter had barely lasted a day. He shook his head and gestured for a very amused looking Harry to continue.

"On the day of the task we were taken to the Black Lake-"

"You had to go under the lake? For an _hour_?" Teddy interrupted, horrified by the thought. He had never liked swimming.

"I took some Gillyweed - a very strange experience I can tell you - and, if I remember rightly, Fleur and Cedric used a Bubble-Head charm and Krum transfigured his head to that of a shark."

Teddy tried to imagine having a shark's head. Yes, Gillyweed did seem a much more preferable option.

"After getting away from some Grindylows and with a little help from Moaning Myrtle I heard some more mersong which lead me to the Merpeople's village. There I saw four people tied to the tail of a stone Merperson. Ron and Hermione were two of them of course but there was also Gabrielle and Cho."

Teddy had only met Vic's aunt a handful of times but she seemed nice enough. He had never met Cho, though and he couldn't help wonder why she was there. Cedric was the only obvious person she could be there for. He told himself sternly that, that didn't necessarily mean they had been an item. He imagined it would be quite awkward if Harry had dated the girl who had lost her boyfriend, which he had competed against, the year before. But all this was none of his concern. He focused back on the story.

"Were they alright?" He couldn't help but ask. Hermione and Ron in particular are like aunt and uncle to him after all. Harry suddenly looked sheepish and rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, they were just in an enchanted sleep. They were perfectly fine." Teddy struggled not to burst into laughter.

"You tried to rescue them all didn't you?"

It wasn't really all that funny, he would be pretty panicked too if he saw the people he loved tied up (he imagined Victoire floating unconsciously in the dark water and suppressed a shiver), but it was such a _Harry_ thing to do.

"How was I supposed to know they would be fine when the hour was up?" Harry defended, though he too looked amused at his past naïvety. Teddy just shook his head in bemusement.

"Anyway, Cedric arrived pretty soon after I freed Ron and took Cho. I then helped Krum free Hermione –his shark-head was making things a bit tricky for him - but Fleur never turned up."

Teddy frowned, that didn't sound like Fleur. She was nothing if not very protective of her sister. That's what Victoire had told him anyway.

"The Merpeople weren't too happy with me taking Gabrielle as well as Ron so they tried to stop me but I pulled out my wand and they scattered. I dragged Ron and Gabrielle up to the surface, with the Merpeople following behind and...that was it really. When we broke the surface the task was over," he ended with a light shrug as if he had only been talking about the breakfast he made in the morning.

Teddy couldn't believe he had never heard of this. It sounded like an amazing story.

"Did you win?"

"Well no, I was outside the time lim- oh you mean the tournament?"

Teddy nodded. Harry seemed to hesitate before answering.

"I- guess in a way- I think we tied. Me- me and Cedric." His voice faltered at Cedric's name. He looked down at his hands as though suddenly interested in his wedding ring.

"How's that possible?" Teddy wondered out loud.

"There was this- _cup_ that we both had to get to. In the last task, in the center of a maze. We got there together and I- I said that- that we should take it together..." Teddy was startled and confused by how _ashamed_ Harry sounded as he spoke. He tried to smile comfortingly.

"Of course you did. Sounds like something you would do." Harry didn't seem very comforted by this, so again he tried to navigate away from the topic. "Why did you enter thought? I didn't think you would go in for that sort of thing."

"I didn't."

"But you sa-"

"I didn't enter myself. I was entered," Harry explained shortly.

Teddy frowned. Surely Harry didn't have to compete if he didn't want to? "By who?"

"Barty Crouch Jr." Teddy closed his eyes in concentration. That name. Where had he heard that name? His mind decided to go unhelpfully blank on him.

"I've heard of him somewhere. I know I have," he murmured aloud.

"He was a death eater," Harry supplied dryly.

"Hell. Did he think you'd die in a task or something?" Teddy griped the desk underneath him tightly as he asked.

"No. It was a trap. The cup was a port-key."

Teddy gaped. "How- how the hell?" his mind was spinning. His godfather had only been fourteen and yet an elaborate plan was made just to...to what? Teddy didn't want to think about it.

"He was disguised as my DADA professor that year," Harry continued "We thought he was Alastor Moody."

Now Moody Teddy had no trouble remembering. If he had been in the mood he would have smiled, knowing that Moody had been close to his mother.

"Where did you go?" Teddy regretted the question as soon as it left his mouth. Harry stood up abruptly.

"To a graveyard." Harry ran an agitated hand though his hair as he wandered back over to the window. "Ted, I don't – I really don't want to talk about this," he whispered.

Teddy stood too. He spoke just as softly,

"It's when _he_ came back isn't it? You said that he came back at the end of your fourth year."

"_Yeah_." Teddy barely heard the reply. He walked over to Harry so he was standing beside him.

"And Cedric? Was that when...?" Harry didn't answer. He didn't have to. The wetness of his eyes told Teddy everything. He pulled his godfather into a hug. "I'm so sorry," he whispered. They stayed like that for some time, till Harry spoke, softly but passionately.

"He didn't have to die. He didn't have to be there. He wasn't _supposed_ to be there. He wasn't supposed to touch the cup. It wasn't _him_ they wanted. If only I'd just...I shouldn't have..."

Teddy pulled himself out of the hug.

"Did you know it was a port-key?"

"I wouldn't have touched it if I did, Ted," Teddy gave him a pointed look, but Harry seemed oblivious so he pressed on,

"Did you know it was a trap? Did you know he was going to die?"

"No."

Teddy crossed his arms over his chest defiantly. "Well, then none of it was your fault now was it?"

Harry looked just as stubborn, "Ted, I _told_ him to take the cup with me."

"And then you drew you wand and killed him?" Harry stared at Teddy as if he had never met him before, shock delaying his protest.

"What- what no!"

"Then it wasn't your fault!" Teddy reached out and gripped Harry's arm. "What if it had been me? Would you blame me?"

"No. No of course not," Harry was quick to reassure.

"_Oh,_ right," Teddy clapped his hand to his forehead as if just remembering "-but because it's _you_, it's _perfectly_ alright," his voice dripped with sarcasm. His eyes turned a stormy grey.

"Godric, who do you think you are?" Teddy all but shouted. "How many things do you blame yourself for?" he demanded, not waiting for an answer, "It must be lots. Do you blame yourself for the weather too? It was raining yesterday. I got wet. Of course it's _your_ fault."

"Teddy-"

"Because _of course _you saw it all coming; you knew everything, who was going to die, when, how. You were only a kid, but of course, because it's _you_ that doesn't matter does it? You're only human, ah but wait, you're _you_ so you're not _allowed_ to make mistakes. Not allowed to make the wrong choice, or let people protect you-"

"Ted please just-"

"Shut up? No. I'm going to keep on at you till you say, 'I'm a complete idiot, and have to stop blaming myself for things I have no control over' and bloody _mean _it."

"Ted- you can't – you weren't there, you don't-"

"_Don't_ tell me I don't understand! I may not have been there but I _know_ you. My parents _died_ in that bloody war, and yet you don't see me blaming you, now do you? I don't blame you for a _thing_." He was breathing heavily. His hair now a vivid crimson. "_They wouldn't blame you. No one has the right to blame you, and if anyone tries I'll- I'll-"_

"Teddy, Teddy _calm_ down." It was Harry's turn grip Teddy's arm. "You've made your point."

Teddy took a relaxing breath. He felt like a huge weight had lifted from his chest. He'd always hated seeing Harry blame himself for things long past, to let guilt eat away at him like that. "And?"

Harry sighed deeply, looking far older than Teddy knew he was. "And I'm a complete idiot."

"And?" Teddy prompted.

"And I have to stop blaming myself." Teddy hugged Harry tightly, murmuring into his shirt,

"You mean it?"

"Yes. I'll try. I promise." Harry vowed sincerely.

"Good," Teddy told him firmly then smiled widely. That was until he held his watch up.

"Damn! I'm late for class, I missed break too!" He complained.

"Well, don't look at me," Harry smirked. "It's not _my_ fault!"

* * *

><p><strong>Help me celebrate and let me know what you think? (I'm trying my best to get less 'cheesy' but I don't see it happening) I hope I get more time to write soon! Sorry for not replying to reviews (Anon reviews replied to on my profile) during my 'disappearance', though I have tried to catch up. Thanks to Dramioneprefected and welcome back to 'Just An Old Typewriter'! Well time to disappear again... -Ami x <strong>


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